Monday, January 27, 2014

Krave S'mores Cereal Review!

Kellogg's long-awaited third entry in the "Krave" brand family has arrived...and it's, in a word, "freakin' delicious." 

Nearly two years ago, I reviewed Kellogg's (then) brand new double-shot of breakfast cereals: Krave Chocolate (which tasted like chocolate, despite having an exterior shell that looked like your standard Shredded Wheat chunks) and Krave Double Chocolate, which was both your traditional coal-block chocolate hue AND your standard hyper-sugary choco-offering. I enjoyed both, for the most part, and like everybody else in America, I have been impatiently waiting for Kellogg's to release a third member for the Krave IP family. While I was hoping for something extra ridiculous (a "Triple Chocolate" variation, perhaps?), the tertiary variation the company actually did trot out is something way more amazing than anything I could've dreamed up: ladies and gentlemen, I give you...Krave S'MORES.

Periodically, I will get comments and e-mails from folks asking me if the stuff I say on this blog is what I actually think, in real life. While I will continue to make you guess as to my true inclinations regarding everything else on this site, I want this to be unmistakable: Krave S'mores is one of the most delicious things I have ever put in my mouth, and I'm 100 percent sincere when I say it's already one of the greatest breakfast cereals of all time. This stuff isn't just an excellent addendum to the brand, it's an absolute masterpiece of cereal-engineering.

The back packaging of the box tells you pretty much everything you need to know about the target audience of the product. Whereas most cereals have puzzles and cut-out masks and mail-in information for novelty premiums that generally take half a year to arrive at your house, the Krave S'mores product art is something of a pastiche of your celebrity-obsessed rags -- clearly, not the kind of stuff most eight-year-olds would really be into. Even the CGI-like design of the anti-mascots (a chocolate bar that may or may not be Hershey's and a lightly toasted marshmallow) seem to reek of a certain adult sensibility -- and the inclusion of the founding Krave cereal bits as hyper-jealous paparazzi (why most co-branded cereals ALWAYS rely upon the intra-family rivalry gimmick, anyway?) is just the hypothetical icing atop the purely metaphorical cake here.

The cereal bits themselves aren't the most impressive specimens in the world -- they look just like your regular Krave chunks, after all -- but that's not necessarily a negative. I mean, why monkey around with an already proven formula for success? Furthermore, I have to give Kellogg's proper dap for the vacuum sealed plastic pouch the contents are shipped in. That stuff felt futuristic and sturdy as shit, folks.

As this cereal biopsy clearly shows, the guts of the new cereal consist of a gooey paste that, as the product name implies, would appear to be one part melted chocolate bar goo and one point silver streak of marshmallow paste. The internal gunk doesn't really have a distinct smell, per se, but the overall product definitely has an aroma altogether different than its fore-bearers.

More than anything, I would say the product exudes something of a vanilla aroma -- which, really, is a scent/flavor/texture that you would think a lot more cereal producers would want to imitate, but whatever. There's definitely a nice crunch to the cereal chunks (a harder feat for cereal engineers to accomplish than it appears), but ultimately, it's the taste and texture of the product that really puts this thing over the top. Imagine that...the FLAVOR of a cereal being its utmost selling point. 

Describing the overall taste of Krave S'mores is a bit difficult, because depending on how much marshmallow paste is in an individual chunk, the overall flavor of the cereal varies from almost peanut-butter-tasting (comparable to the Reese's cereal, I would say) to almost white chocolate-ish. I don't think I've ever eaten a cereal that had the same general taste as this one, and that is most certainly a positive. As difficult as it may be to explain how the food feels, this much, I can assure you: it tastes quite goddamn great.

Of course, with an ample serving of your favorite milk-like solute (I opted for off-brand soy myself), an already delicious product becomes even more incredible. I may be prone to hyperbole every now and then, but I can state -- with nary a sarcastic molecule in my body -- that Krave S'mores is one of the best cereals I have ever tasted. The greatness of the cereal is so hard to put into words, but then again, cereal is for eatin' and not deconstructin', I suppose.

So, just how good is this stuff, you may be asking? Well, I popped open a fresh box on a Saturday morning, and by late evening, the entire cardboard box was just a collection of beige dust. That's right, it was so darned tasty that I ate an entire package over the course of about six or eight hours. And I promise you, I wasn't high on anything at the time...

...well, except for the natural high that can only come about via eating large quantities of a delectable, new-wave breakfast cereal, anyway.

1 comment:

  1. I usually have Krave Chocolate cereals in my daily routine and my kids like Krave Double Chocolate. I have tasted both and it’s good. Kellogg’s is among famous cereal brands worldwide.


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