Near upsets a plenty, and a separation of Power(5)s
By: Jimbo X
The Associated Press? The USA Today's Coaches Poll? Whatever jibber-jabber is being puked out over at ESPN and Bleacher Report? Puh-leeze, we all know those alleged "Top 25" countdowns are pathetic jokes penned by homers, Power Five loyalists and Notre Dame nuthuggers. That's why I decided to release my own weekly rundown of the best FBS college football squads in the States, completely devoid of all the usual fanboyism and corporate malarkey that makes lists of the like elsewhere so unbelievably annoying.
Throughout the regular season, a new installment will go up every Wednesday morning, so you may want to bookmark this sucker for future reference ... and to show to all of your fellow NCAA football lovin' chums, so they can know that -- at least somewhere out in the tangled, endlessly frustrating World Wide Web -- there's someone on the Internet with some goddamn horse sense when it comes to ranking college 'ball teams.
Ohio State (2-0)
The Buckeyes had no problems at all steamrolling the Rainbow Warriors, as standout halfback Ezekiel Elliot rushed for three touchdowns in a 38-0 rout of Hawaii. Urban Meyer's highly-touted juggernaut takes on Northern Illinois this Saturday, in what should be another one-sided drubbing.
The Crimson Tide cruised past Middle Tennessee on Saturday, with Derrick Henry galloping for three touchdowns while Jake Coker racked up 214 yards in just two quarters. The SEC powerhouse will finally get a worthy opponent this weekend, when Bama hosts undefeated divisional foe Ole Miss at Bryant-Denny Stadium.
After a less than exhilarating victory over Minnesota in week one, TCU came roaring back in week two with a dominant 70-7 win over Stephen F. Austin, in which QB Trevone Boykin hit paydirt four times for almost 300 yards. Don't expect SMU to give the Horned Frogs much of a challenge over the weekend.
Seth Russell threw for 342 yards and four TDs while Shock Linwood ran 130 yards for three touchdowns in the Golden Bears' 66-31 win over Lamar. Baylor takes a breather this weekend before doing battle with Rice on Sept. 26.
Michigan State (2-0)
The Spartans made a big statement with their 31-28 victory over Oregon. This Saturday, undefeated Air Force will try to shock the football world, as they travel to Lansing in what could be a suprisingly competitive little tilt.
The Tigers came *THIS* close to dropping Saturday's game against Jacksonville State, needing both some gloriously inept clock management from JSU and overtime to thwart a colossal upset. We'll see exactly what kind of football team Auburn really is, when they travel to Death Valley for a SEC West showdown with LSU.
Southern California (2-0)
Cody Kessler had three touchdowns and 410 yards in USC's 59-6 win over Idaho. The Trojans will have their first real test of the season when they hook up with divisional rivals Stanford (who, over the last few years, have just seemed to have SoCal's number) this Saturday night in L.A.
With Deshaun Watson tossing three touchdowns for 248 yards, Appalachian State just didn't have a response for Clemson, as the Tigers pummeled the Mountaineers 41-10. Watson and the gang takes a trip to Louisville this weekend, where they'll go toe-to-toe with Bobby Petrino's still-winless Cardinals.
Florida State (2-0)
In the Seminoles' effortless 34-14 win over South Florida, Dalvin Cook scored three touchdowns and ran for 266 yards. FSU visits Chestnut Hill this Saturday, where the undefeated Boston College Eagles (who just clobbered Howard 76-0) are aspiring for a major upset.
The Bulldogs didn't post any earth-shattering stats in their 31-14 victory over Vanderbilt; instead, they just ran the ball effectively and put points on the board with their special teams unit when their passing game wasn't getting it done. UGA has their first real challenge of the season this weekend, as South Carolina comes to Sanford Stadium looking to remove the Dawgs from the ranks of the unbeaten.
Notre Dame (2-0)
The Irish received a huge blow in their narrow 34-27 victory over Virginia, as star QB Malik Zaire went out with a season-ending injury. Although DeShone Kizer played well as backup and receiver Will Fuller pulled in two touchdowns for the day, you really have to worry about Notre Dame's chances the rest of the season, beginning with their contest against Georgia Tech this Saturday.
It wasn't even close this weekend, as the Bruins drubbed UNLV 37-3 in a game that saw Paul Perkins haul in two TD passes for 151 yards on the day. UCLA has a much tougher road to hoe this weekend, however, as the early season surprise BYU Cougars come a marching into the Rose Bowl.
Texas A&M (2-0)
Aggies QB Kyle Allen looked sharp in A&M's 56-23 win over Ball State, tossing three touchdowns and going 10 for 13 in pass attempts. The squad should have an easy night in College Station Saturday, as the Aggies play host to a lackluster Nevada team.
Georgia Tech (2-0)
The Yellow Jackets ran for six touchdowns in their 65-10 rout of Tulane over the weekend. This Saturday, Georgia Tech gets their first real test of the season, as they travel to South Bend to take on an injury-hampered, but unquestionably dangerous, Notre Dame squad.
Ole Miss (2-0)
In their first two games of the season, the Rebels have accumulated an absurd 140-plus points. While Chad Kelly was able to toss four touchdowns for 346 yards against Fresno State, only the most die hard of the Ole Miss faithful are optimistic he'll put up similar numbers against 'Bama this Saturday night.
It took double overtime, but the Sooners proved their Big 12 meddle in a 31-24 victory over Tennessee. Oklahoma gets what ought to be light homework this weekend, as they host non-factor Tulsa at Memorial Stadium in Norman.
I knew Mormons don't believe in drinking, smoking or caffeine, but until this weekend's 35-24 victory over Boise State, I had no idea that they DO believe in punching your adversaries in the testicles, hard. The Cougars look to stay undefeated this weekend, when they take their finest ball-busting cleats to Southern Cal for a Pac-12 showdown with UCLA.
There was nothing flashy about the Utes 24-14 victory over Utah State -- they just ran the ball effectively, with no less than three backs hitting the endzone for paydirt. Utah travels to Fresno State this weekend, in what very well could be a trap game if they aren't careful.
Nick Wilson had a career day, rushing for almost 200 yards and three touchdowns in the Wildcats' victory over Nevada last week. The undefeated 'Cats host Northern Arizona over the weekend, in what should be a relatively facile outing.
After upsetting Stanford in week one and blanking Eastern Illinois last week, isn't it about time the Wildcats started getting just a little bit of national attention? They'll travel to ACC Country this weekend, awaiting a clash with an undefeated Duke team fresh off a 55-0 mauling of North Carolina Central.
Last Saturday's razor-thin 27-20 victory over Arkansas State was WAY too close for comfort. The (barely) undefeated Tigers get a chance to bounce back this Saturday, when they go toe-to-toe with a lackluster UConn Huskies team in Columbia.
It was a nail-biter, but the Tigers managed to squeak by divisional foes Mississippi State last week, 21-19. We'll see if Leonard Fournette -- who had three touchdowns against the Bulldogs -- will be the big "x"-factor when LSU hosts a still-smartin' Auburn team this weekend.
Kansas State (2-0)
The other, other, OTHER Big 12 team has given up just three points all season, crushing Texas-San Antonio over the weekend 30-3. The Wildcats have an easy opportunity to go 3-0 this Saturday, as they play host to a hapless Louisiana Tech.
Sure, the Hurricanes may not be able to boast too much about beating up on Bethune-Cookman and Florida Atlantic, but they get a chance to really make some waves this weekend, as the "U" hosts Nebraska at home. Keep an eye on Mark Walton; the Miami running back had three touchdowns on 14 carries last week.
Oklahoma State (2-0)
Of course, nobody's confusing Central Michigan or Central Arkansas for top-tier teams. Regardless, the Cowboys have looked mighty impressive so far in the season, and a victory over Texas-San Antonio this weekend seems all but a given; give 'em a few weeks and Oklahoma State's stock is destined to rise very, very high.