A fond look back at all the things that OUTRAGED ultra-P.C. jihadists ... before they forget all about them in a few days.
By: Jimbo X
Boston clinic praised for giving pain pill addicts pot
The Boston Herald -- whose geographic beat is unarguably the most liberal sector of the country as well as its most racially-segregated -- recently celebrated Canna Care Docs, a multi-state consortium with no less than nine clinics in Massachusetts. To help turn the tide against an epidemic of opiod addictions, Dr. Gary Witman of Fall River has begun prescribing good old fashioned, totally harmless medical marijuana to those already hooked on pain pills, because, in his words, "you are basically taking something that can be very harmful for an individual and substituting with another chemical, just like you would any other drug that has a wider safety margin." Of course, Dr. Witman could also prescribe his patients cocaine and the logic would still be consistent, but marijuana should totally be legal, ya'll, even if it means falsifying alleged "medical benefits" in the process! At least somebody in the environs seems to smell what the full of crock doc is cooking here: the Herald quotes the founder of a local substance abuse support group, who calls the "pain pills to pot pipeline" hypothesis, and I quote, "total bullshit."
White people continue to fight anti-Native American prejudice, ignore contemporary plight of said Native Americans
The hottest trend in white-guilt politicking? Why, going after that no good scallowag Christopher Columbus, who I bet you didn't know was a rapist, murderer and probable cannibal in addition to being a world-famous explorer. Screeching, anti-colonialist (nothing says 'cutting edge' quite like attacking something that died a century ago!) screeds like this one were a dime a dozen throughout the week, as states like Alaska and California did their paleface apologist parts by, respectively, renaming Columbus Day "Indigenous Peoples Day" and forcing barely a half-dozen schools to change their "Redskin" mascots. Lost in the narrative, I am afraid, is how all of this retroactive shaming is of any benefit to the remaining Native Americans in the U.S., who continue to post the highest rates of poverty, alcoholism, suicide and diabetes of any demographic in the country -- and sans hardly any assistance from the same progressive sorts who are making such a fuss about ol' Cristobal Colon being such a bad wittle man at the present.
Connecticut school does about face on Halloween cancellation after Internet makes fun of them
Thanks to that fantastic little social justice enabler called the Internet, Milford Public Schools in Connecticut has reneged on plans to cancel Halloween celebrations. Before the masses gave 'em the what-fer, the administrators of the lily-white school system said they were mulling the concept of yanking Halloween out of the schools, due to fears of children being "excluded" because of their religious and cultural backgrounds. Interestingly enough, that entailed not only the complete elimination of parades and costumes, but the outright ban of the term Halloween in favor of the multipurpose "fall" nomenclature as well as a strict prohibition of giving children food of any kind to celebrate the season. One outraged parent stated the following on an online petition, which, really, could be used as a uniform critique of post-post-liberalism inclusivity uber alles philosophy as a whole: "I'm so tired of my kids missing out on some of the things we all got to do as children and are some of the greatest childhood memories I have due to others saying they find it offensive."
Playboy concedes defeat to online smut, will no longer publish nekkid pictures of women
After decades of providing the classiest wank fodder in the publishing world, iconic men's entertainment magazine Playboy is throwing in the (spunk) towel, as the mag's editor in chief announced it would no longer be publishing photographs of nude women. The reason for this judgment call depends upon who you ask: while the editor himself said it is an attempt to reel in peculiarly sex-averse Millennials and expand its online presence, others have suggested an altogether different motive: blowback (but not that kind of blowback) from the hardcore feminist set. The Guardian scribe Jessica Valenti puts it thusly: "Nudity was never really the feminist problem with Playboy, because there's nothing sexist in and of itself about images of naked women. The idea that men are entitled to those women, however -- an idea that spans across culture regardless of pornifide bonadies -- is an issue."
Rich New York broad tries to sue nephew/orphan for hugging her
A particularly jowelly-Upper East Side woman became the most hated rich bitch this side of Leona Helmsley when she attempted to sue her nephew, whose mother recently died, because he broke her wrist in an overly-affectionate hug back in 2011. It took jurors less than half an hour to throw out the $127,000 suit, in which plaintiff Jennifer Connell said her ability to hold hors d'evoures plates has greatly diminished since the incident. As you'd expect, the cyber lynch-mob came out in full keyboard warrior mode for this one, as commentators took to the Twitter with the hashtag #AuntFromHell, leaving behind such thoughtful observations as this little diatribe (which, if you can believe it, is actually one of the more subdued populist rants you'll find on the matter.)
Texas students combat campus-carry laws by bringing sex toys to class
Following a controversial state mandate that now allows those with concealed carry weapons permits to lug their miscellaneous firearms into Texas colleges and universities, some students at the state's largest place of higher education plan to strike back ... by tying dildos to their backpacks. Sure, it has nice symbolic value (you see, you are technically allowed to bring guns into more public places than you are synthetic peni) but considering this is a literal life-or-death public policy matter, don't you think these merry little pranksters ought to be taking a more serious approach to the issue? I mean, it's almost as if gun-control proponents, as a collective, tend to be ill-informed, astonishingly lazy and embarrassingly non-confrontational, thus automatically giving the NRA types the policy victory by default, no?
Not even black people want a statue honoring MLK atop Stone Mountain
The same week a gaggle of Georgians -- some of them, reportedly, black and Hispanic -- were charged with gang-related terrorism for driving by a black kids birthday party with Confederate flags, Atlanta Confederacy history groups and NAACP affiliates surprisingly came together against plans for a statue honoring Martin Luther King, Jr. to be erected atop Stone Mountain -- a massive Georgia landmark perhaps best known for featuring a massive engraving of several C.S.A. leaders. While a Sons of Confederate Veterans spokeshonky said he doesn't want the proposed memorial there because it creates an anachronism, the president of the Southern Christian Leadership Conference said he doesn't want King's visage anywhere near the monument where the Ku Klux Klan was purportedly resurrected in the early 20th century. The fate of the Tupac Shakur statue at the foothills of the mountain, however, remains uncertain.
A great week for gender equality
Rapper hounded for hurtful comments about Hilary
While all eyes were on an uneventful Democratic debate noteworthy only for Bernie Sanders' swearing and Jim Webb admitting that he killed a dude once, Atlanta rapper T.I. -- whose work is generally considered among the most blatantly misogynistic in an industry more or less built upon it -- got scrutinized hard for saying that he didn't think Hilary Clinton would be intimidating enough to folks like Putin and that one dude in Iran who doesn't like the Jews. After being chided by Oprah, T.I. issued a public apology, stating he was remorseful he ever said the Loch Ness Monster had a better chance of being elected than Mrs. Bill Clinton.
The Washington Post chides D.C. store owners for caring about shoplifting
And wrapping up this week's installment, I turn your attention to this little wannabe-expose from the WaPo, in which self-professed (and unbearably Caucasian) "social justice problem solver" Terrence McCoy took several Georgetown retailers to task for using a police-connected app to alert local authorities to shoplifters. The unforgivable rub there, per Mr. McCoy? That dadgum app is resulting in far too many black people getting racial profiled ... this, in a city with among the highest black populations in the U.S., in which the number of African-American residents outnumber white residents by a good 100,000 or so people. Take it from one of the nation's leading social justice warriors, then: you can still be victim of minority discrimination, even when you belong to a group that represents an overwhelming regional majority.