Sunday, November 17, 2019

LIVE(ish) Play-By-Play Coverage from Week 11's Raiders vs. Bengals Game

This Week's Episode:
"The Path of Least Resistance"

By: Jimbo X

It's that time of year again, folks! After an off-season that was eventful, to say the least, the 2019-2020 Oakland Raiders season is officially underway, and needless to say, expectations have NEVER been lower for our beloved silver-and-black bedecked squadron. Because we here at The Internet Is In America are loyal traditionists to a "T" (and also, glutons for punishment), we're going to be doing our damnedest to bring you LIVE play-by-play coverage of EVERY single Oakland Raiders game of the season, continuing with this afternoon's road matchup against Indianapolis. So join us LIVE on SUNDAY, NOV. 17 starting at 4 p.m. Eastern time as our patented, award-winning, possession-by-possession coverage of week 11's Raiders vs. Bengals game gets rolling. There'll be updates every commercial break, so be sure to bookmark this shit prior to kickoff — and, as always, feel free to do us and yourselves a kindness and let all your online Raiders fans know what we're offering 'em by posting links to our coverage on your social media pages. Such, I assure you, is greatly appreciated — and something tells me we're gonna' need as much help as we can damn get this season, for sure.

10:54 a.m. - The Raiders waltz into this afternoon's clash against the winless Bengals with a 5-4 record. Vegas has Oakland as a -13 favorite over 0-9 Cincinnati, which HAS to be the single largest point spread in favor of the Raiders I've seen in a LONG time. Like, Rich Gannon had to have been the starting QB and shit, ya'll.

10:55 a.m. - The over/under is 48, with the money line set at -750 for the Raiders. ESPN's Football Power Index gives Oakland an 84.4 percent chance to win this game, which, yeah, they really have no excuse not to.

10:56 a.m. - In terms of offensive production, the Bengals are averaging about 268.8 passing and 70.3 rushing per contest. Meanwhile, the Raiders are averaging 248.7 passing yards and 129.9 rushing yards a game.

10:57 a.m. - And defensively, the Bengals are allowing 263.2 passing yards a game and 173 rushing.The Raiders, conversely, are allowing almost 300.2 passing yards per game, yet only 98.4 rushing per contest.

10:58 a.m. - For Cincy, receiver AJ Green and guard Alex Redmond are both scratches, while tackles Bobby Hart and Geno Atkins are both listed as questionable. For the Raiders, receiver and return specialist Dwayne Harris and tackle Trent Brown are listed as questionable, while safety Lamarcus Joyner and tackle David Sharep are known outs.

10:59 a.m. - Alright, I'll be back here at 4 p.m. The official kick is 4:25 p.m., so that gives you plenty of time to stock up on Wild Cherry Pepsi Max and Bubble Yum.  See you in just a bit, homies.

4:22 p.m. - The Vikings just pulled off a HYUGE comeback against the Broncos, so that gives the Raiders a little bit more cushion in the AFC West standings.

4:23 p.m. - The Steelers losing Thursday night gave the Raiders the de facto sixth seed in the playoffs race, but unfortunately, it looks like the Bills won big over the Fins. The Colts also won, but the Raiders have the postseason tiebreaker over them due to their head-to-head win earlier this season.

4:26 p.m. - Remember: Devoto stops HIV or something. Also, it may give you liver failure in addition to the AIDS you already have. Holy fuck, what a long commercial.

4:30 p.m. - The Bengals win the coin toss and elect to defer. Raiders take possession at their own 25.

4:30 p.m. - Hey, Trent Green is doing commentary duties. Fuck him.

4:31 p.m. - And Jacobs runs for about 20 yards on the first first down run.

4:31 p.m. - That was one missed tackle away from being a touchdown. First and 10 at the OAK 44. Jacobs hauls in the pass for a couple of yards.

4:32 p.m. - Second and eight. Carr calls an audible. Jacobs runs for about two more.

4:32 p.m. - Third and six. Richard is in the backfield. And Carr gets sacked under pressure.

4:34 p.m. - Raiders punt, and the Bengals will take over around their own 30.

4:36 p.m. - Ryan Finley takes the first snap. Mixon takes it for about 14, 15 yards on the pass.

4:37 p.m. - First and 10 at the CIN 44. Boyd gets hit at the line for no gain.

4:37 p.m. - Second and nine. Ferrell bats down the pass for a NEAR interception.

4:38 p.m. - Third and nine. Findley is sacked, the ball comes out and HURTS SCOOPS UP THE FUMBLE!

4:39 p.m. - Crosby karate chopped the ball out of Findley's hands, by the way.

4:40 p.m. - The Raiders' O takes over at the CIN 29. Jacobs runs for about five on the first down run.

4:41 p.m. - Second and six. Jacobs easily has enough to move the sticks.

4:41 p.m. - First and 10 at the Cin 17. Jacsobs takes it isndie the Cin 10, but he FUMBLES THE BALL AWAY and the Bengals recover.

Yep. Totally a guy the Raiders should've traded away in the offseason, right?

4:44 p.m. - Mixon finds a huge hole and almost takes it to midfield on a 40-yard run.

4:44 p.m. - First and 10, at the CIN 45. Under pressure, and the pass to Boyd is broken up by ERIK HARRIS.

4:45 p.m. - Second and 10. OK, so it's "Finley" without the D. Noted. Mixon takes it up the gut for a four yard gain, it appears.

4:46 p.m. - Third and six. Neutral zone infraction call against the Raiders.

4:47 p.m. - Third and one. The bobbled pass to the tight end is reeled in to move the sticks.

4:48 p.m. - Second and eight. Mixon gets abou three or four on the run.

4:49 p.m. - Third and four. The pass to Eifert is complete, but it's way short of the first down marker.

4:50 p.m. - The Bengals are going for it on fourth down. Eiffert hauls in the pass around the OAK 25.

4:51 p.m. - Cincinnati is at the OAK 18. Finley's pass is VERY incomplete.

4:51 p.m. - Second and 10. Bernard takes it to the OAK 9 for a first and goal situation.

4:51 p.m. - Mixon takes it to the OAK 7.

4:52 p.m. - Second and goal. The pass is ALMOST intercepted by Mullen. A flag is down in the end zone.

4:53 p.m. - And Mullen gets hit with a pass interference call. Put the pigskin at the OAK 4. And Mixon cuts back for a touchdown run.

4:54 p.m. - The XP is good. And the Bengals take the 7-0 lead with 3:03 left in the first quarter.

4:58 p.m. - Trevor Davis takes a knee in the end zone. The Raiders will take over at their own 20.

4:58 p.m. - Joe Mixon's mom is a big fat black woman. Carr hits Waller for about three yards.

4:59 p.m. - Second and seven. Carr targets Jacobs and he should have enough to move the sticks.

4:59 p.m. - Jacobs runs for about three, maybe four.

4:59 p.m. - Second and seven. And Carr gets sacked again.

5:00 p.m. - Third and 13. Renfrow picks up just three or four on the pass. Raiders have to punt.

5:04 p.m. - The Bengals' return man goes down around the 30.

5:05 p.m. - Mixon runs for two, possibly three yards.

5:05 p.m. - Second and nine. The pass to Uzami is no good.

5:05 p.m. - Third and nine. Under pressure, and the pass falls incomplete. Bengals must punt.

5:06 p.m. - Davis set to return for the Raiders. He fair catches it at the OAK 20.

5:07 p.m. - A flag is down. An illegal block in the back call against Oakland.

5:10 p.m. - The Raiders start at their own nine. Washington gets maybe a yard on the run.

5:11 p.m. - Second and nine. Williams is WIDE OPEN for a 24-yard gain.

5:11 p.m. - First and 10. Washington gets about five on the catch.

5:11 p.m. - Second and four. Washington gets hit at the line.

5:12 p.m. - Third and six. Carr tags Williams BETWEEN DEFENDERS for a damn near 20 yard gain.

5:13 p.m. - Actually, that was THREE defenders. First and 10 at the CIN 42.

5:13 p.m. - Richard goes back four for a big loss.

5:14 p.m. - Second and 14. Carr hits Washington for a small pick-up

5:14 p.m. - Third and six. CARR HITS RENFROW FOR A NEARLY 30 YARD GAIN!

5:15 p.m.- First and 10 in the red zone. There's a 12 men in the huddle penalty against the Raiders.

5:16 p.m. - First and 15 at the CIN 16. The Raiders call a timeout.

5:19 p.m. - Still first and 15. Waller takes the pass down to the CIN 2.

5:19 p.m. - Second and one. Jacobs appears to get stopped at the line.

5:20 p.m. - Third and one. Two yards to go for a score. Carr hits a WIDE OPEN Moreau for the easiest TD pass you'll see all season.

5:21 p.m. - The XP is good. It's all knotted up, 7-7, with about seven minutes left in the first half.

Now that's a running back committee I actually CAN get behind.

5:26 p.m. - It's first and 10 at the CIN 10 for the Bengals after a penalty on the kickoff.

5:26 p.m. - Boyd takes it across the 20 on the run for a new set of downs.

5:26 p.m. - First and 10. Mixon runs for about two, possibly three yards.

5:27 p.m. - Second and seven. The pass is incomplete, and was *yay* close to being intercepted.

5:28 p.m. - Third and seven. Cincinnati calls a timeout right before the delay of game penalty.

5:29 p.m. - Still third and seven. Finley is under pressure and the pass to Boyd falls incomplete. Bengals' gotta punt.

5:30 p.m. - Davis fair catches it at the OAK 20.

5:32 p.m. - Jacobs finds a hole and runs for about 10 yards.

5:33 p.m. - Carr hits Williams at midfield. Another first down for the Raiders.

5:34 p.m. - And there's a late hit call on the Bengals to give the Raiders even more yardage.

5:35 p.m. - First and 10 at the CIN 35. Jacobs runs for about nine.

5:36 p.m. - Second and one. Jacobs runs for about four and easily picks up a new set of downs.

5:36 p.m. - First and 10 at the CIN 20. Carr hits Jacobs for about three, possibly four yards.

5:36 p.m. - Second and seven. Jacobs runs for about five. And that'll take us to the two-minute warning.

5:39 p.m. - Third and two. And Renfrow gets marked down at the CIN 2. 

5:40 p.m. - First and goal. The Bengals call a timeout.

5:41 p.m. - Jacobs gets stopped at the line.

5:42 p.m. - Second and goal. Cincinnati calls another timeout.

5:42 p.m. - Waller can't reel in the TD pass. That's Carr's first incompletion of the game.

5:42 p.m. - Third and goal. And the Raiders call a timeout.

5:44 pm. - AND CARR SCRAMBLES FOR A RUSHING TD! That was fugly as fuck, but hey, I'll take it!

5:45 p.m. - Dude dove in there and everything. The XP is good, and the Raiders take the lead 14-7 with less than two minutes left in the quarter.

5:46 p.m. - The Bengals' returnman goes down around the CIN 30.

5:47 p.m. - Finley scrambles into Raiders' territory. That was close to a 20-yard gain.

5:48 p.m. - Bernard hauls in the pass for, like, a one-yard gain, but it's called back on an offensive holding call.

5:49 p.m. - First and 20 at midfield. Tate hauls it in at the OAK 40.

5:49 p.m. - Second and six. A false start call against the Bengals.

5:50 p.m. - Second and 11, with a ten second runoff to boot.

5:51 p.m. - The pass to Eiffert is no good. Third and 11 with 13 seconds left in the quarter.

5:51 p.m. - Looks like Maurice Hurst jumped at the line of scrimmage. It's a five yard penalty against the Raiders.

5:52 p.m. - Third and six. Finley is hit as he throws and the receiver is about three yards shy of moving the sticks.

5:52 p.m. - The Bengals are going for a 53-yard field goal attempt. Oakland calls a timeout.

5:52 p.m. - Time for a re-do on the FG. And it is NO GOOD.

5:53 p.m. - The Raiders take over on downs and just take a knee.

5:54 p.m. - The Bengals get the ball back when we return from halftime. Heading into the third, the Raiders still lead it 14-7.

5:55 p.m. - Alright, time to walk a puppy. See you folks back here in about 20.

6:09 p.m. - It's  second and one situation for the Bengals at midfield. And the pass to Tate is incomplete.

6:09 p.m. - Third and one. Mixon has enough to move the sticks.

6:10 p.m. - First and 10 at midfield. Finley's pass to Mixon falls short.

6:10 p.m. - Second and 10. The shoot to the far side is incomplete, too.

6:11 p.m. - Third and 10. Finley tries to scramble, and he gets tackled after about a four-yard run.

6:12 p.m. - Bengals out to punt. Davis fair catches it at the OAK 8.

6:16 p.m. - Jacobs spins and jukes for about six yards on the first down run.

6:16 p.m. - Second and four. Jacobs pushes forward for three.

6:16 p.m. - Third and one. Carr hits Renfrow for a huge gain, well over 20 yards.

6:17 p.m. - First and 10 at the OAK 38. Carr hits Waller for about a four-yard gain. A flag is down.

6:18 p.m. - Never mind, the refs are waiving off the flag now.

6:19 p.m. - Second and four. Jacobs gets hit at the line.

6:19 p.m. - Third and four. And Bates III picks up the interception. God fuckin' damn it.

6:20 p.m. - Bengals take over at midfield. Mixon runs it down to the OAK 30.

6:21 p.m. - Finley runs for about six yards on a keeper.

6:21 p.m. - Second and four. Bernard looks like he's about two yards short of the first down.

6:22 p.m. - Third and two. Finley's under pressure and he just throws it away.

6:22 p.m. - Here comes the Bengals' field goal unit. Randy Bullock is going for a 40-yard attempt. It's good.

6:23 p.m. - It's 14-10 Oakland, with about seven minutes left in the third quarter.

Remember: this is what constitutes a hardcore Bengals fan.

6:26 p.m. - Raiders take over at their own 20. Jacobs runs it up the middle for three.

6:27 p.m. - Second and seven. Moreau hauls in the pass for about four, maybe five.

6:28 p.m. - Third and three. And Carr gets sacked for the third time today.

6:28 p.m. - Raiders punt and the Bengals return guy goes down around the CIN 30.

6:31 p.m. - Mixon runs for about six.

6:32 p.m. - Second and five. Bernard turns the corner and runs up the sideline for a big gain.

6:33 p.m. - An 18-yard gain. First and 10 at the OAK 45.

6:34 p.m. - Second and six. The deep shot to Tate is incomplete.

6:34 p.m. - Third and six. The pass is ALMOST intercepted.

6:35 p.m. - Cincinnati out to punt. Davis is the return man.

6:36 p.m. - He fair catches it at the OAK 15.

6:37 p.m. - Carr hits Williams at the OAK 32 for a 17-yard gain.

6:38 p.m. - Washington runs pretty close to midfield. Two flags are down.

6:39 p.m. - Double holding calls against the Raiders. 

6:40 p.m. - First and 20 at the OAK 22. Carr runs for about one yard and goes out of bounds.

6:41 p.m. - Second and 19. Richard hauls it in around the OAK 30.

6:41 p.m. - Third and 12. Zay Jones hauls it in for eight, but he's four yards short of the first down marker.

6:42 p.m. - The Raiders punt and Erickson fair catches it around the CIN 15.

6:43 p.m. - Mixon gets two yards, maybe. And that's it for the third quarter.

6:46 p.m. - Second and eight. Mixon dives for a yard, maybe.

6:47 p.m. - Third and seven. FINLEY GETS SACKED AT THE 10 BY CROSBY!

6:47 p.m. - Cincinnati punts. Davis downs it at the OAK 35.

6:48 p.m. - Carr hits Waller for a MAMMOTH gain downfield. A 32-yard pick up.

6:48 p.m. - First and 10 at the CIN 39. Jacobs runs inside the CIN 15 yard line.

6:52 p.m. - Jacobs gets inside the 10 on a run up the gut.

6:53 p.m. - Second and five at the CIN 9. Carr is under pressure and he has to junk it.

6:53 p.m. - Third and five. The Raiders call a timeout.

6:55 p.m. - Still third and five. And it looks like Renfrow will be one yard shy of the first down marker.

6:56 p.m. - The Raiders appear to be going for it on fourth and one. and Ingold EASILY converts.

6:57 p.m. - First and goal. A Bengals defender is down, so we're gonna' take a TV timeout.

6:58 p.m. - The ball is at the Bengals' one yard line.

7:00 p.m. - Flags are down. False start against the Raiders push 'em back five yards. Thanks a lot, Incognito.

7:00 p.m. - First and goal, at the CIN 6. Jacobs runs for about one, maybe two yards.

7:01 p.m. - Second and goal. At the 5. The shot to Waller in the end zone falls incomplete. 

7:01 p.m. - Third and goal. Richard is in the backfield. Jones looks like he's out of bounds at the one yard line.

7:02 p.m. - Carlson is out for the field goal from 20 yards out. It's good. The Raiders extend their lead to 17-10 with about nine minutes left in the fourth.

7:05 p.m. - Bengals take over at their own 25. Finley runs down to the CIN 42.

7:05 p.m. - First and 10. Mixon goes down in the backfield.

7:05 p.m. - Second and 13. And Bernard has enough to move the sticks.


7:06 p.m. - That pushes the Bengals back to a second and 19.

7:06 p.m. - The pass to the sideline falls WAY short. 

7:07 p.m. - Third and 19. It really looks like the Bengals are wearing yoga pants.

7:07 p.m. - Tate hauls in the first down pass, but he got fucking DRILLED on the catch.

So, uh, necks aren't supposed to bend like that, right?

7:12 p.m. - Tate is being carted off the field. His neck went totally Stretch Armstrong on that last play. Yikes.

7:17 p.m. - First and 10 at the OAK 33. Mixon runs for about six.

7:17 p.m. - Second and four. Erickson gets hit right at the line for no gain.

7:17 p.m. - Third and four. Bernard DROPS the first down pass.

7:18 p.m. - Fourth down and four. The Raiders call a timeout.


7:21 p.m. - Raiders take over on downs. Jacobs goes backward two yards on the first down play.

7:21 p.m. - Second and 12. Carr hits Waller for an easy 15-yard gain. A flag is down.

7:22 p.m. - It's offsetting holding calls. Second and 12, again.

7:23 p.m. - And Carr hits Waller AGAIN, this time for a gain down midfield.

7:23 p.m. - First and 10 at the OAK 48. Jacobs runs for about two.

7:23 p.m. - Second and eight. Jacobs runs for about two. The Bengals call a timeout.

7:24 p.m. - Third and six. Jones takes it down to the CIN 35 for an easy first down pick up.

7:25 p.m. - The Bengals call their last timeout.

7:26 p.m. - Jacobs goes back one on the play.

7:27 p.m. - Second and 10. Waller can't turn the corner and a flag is down. Holding against the Raiders.

7:28 p.m. - The Bengals turn down the penalty. It's third and 12.

7:29 p.m. - And Richard runs for about four. That ought to take us to the two-minute warning.

7:32 p.m. - Raiders punt and it'll be a touchback.

7:32 p.m. - First and 10 at the CIN 20. And FINLEY IS SACKED BACK AT THE 11! Crosby with ANOTHER sack.


7:34 p.m. - Derek Carr is taking NO chances here. The Raiders assume the victory formation, and now it's time to run out the clock.

7:35 p.m. - And The Raiders hold on to win it 17-10. Oakland improves to 6-4 on the year, marking their third consecutive in the process.

7:36 p.m. - All I can say is, holy shit, do I LOVE football ... WITH A PASSION.


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