EVERY Atari Lynx Game RANKED! (Part Three: #025 to #001)

Part three of a special three-part series revisiting, reviewing and ranking every single game released on the pioneering handheld.

By:Jimbo X
JimboXAmerican@gmail.com
@JimboX

HEY! Looking for the other installments in this series? You'll find 'em all at the links below:

PART ONE (Games #075 to #051)

PART TWO (Games#050 to #026)

PART THREE (Games #025 to #001)

The Atari Lynx is unquestionably one of the most innovative systems of all-time. The full-color portable was an absolute technological miracle, delivering gamers on-the-go polygonal graphics gaming 15 years before the Nintendo DS and PSP were capable of the same feat. Alas, the adoption rate remained far below that of the original Game Boy and even the Game Gear, meaning very few gamers ever owned the unit - that is, if they ever got their hands on the handheld at all. 

To mark the 28th anniversary of the pioneering portable, we here at The Internet Is In America are counting down EVERY single game in the pantheon of Lynx titles in a special three-part series examining the breadth of the unit's software library. Join us as we embark upon an epic quest to rank, review and rate all 75 official games released for the system, beginning with the suckiest of the suckiest and concluding with the absolute best the handheld had to offer (and trust me, there were some GREAT games on the platform - I mean really great.) 

Before we hop into the first installment, a few ground rules:

- Only officially licensed Lynx games qualify. That means unlicensed games, games that never got a commercial release in the States or aftermarket homebrews are ineligible for consideration.

- All games were rated on a scale from o to 10 and ranked accordingly. Factors taken into consideration included, but were not limited to, gameplay, controls, graphics, audio, level design, multiplayer integration, originality and replayability. 

- Of course I had to play the games using emulated .ROMS. You honestly think I'm going to spend all that money on physical copies of games that mostly suck dick anyway? 

- And lastly, your mileage may vary on the rankings and ratings. I tried to be as genre-neutral as I could, but some of my personal biases might sneak in every now and then. If you don't agree with the placements, feel free to make your own list and send me a link, so I can promptly never read it, you smug, self-centered prick.

And with those pleasantries out of the way, who's ready to get this portable Conga line shaking? Make sure those AA batteries are in there snug, folks ... it's time to party like it's 1989!

#025

Scrapyard Dog (1991)

Developer: CSD, Inc.

Publisher: Atari

Yeah, I know the game is technically a port of an obscure Atari 7800 game, but honestly, this looks and plays so much better than the game it is derived from that it probably shouldn't even be considered a conversion job at all. At heart, Scrapyard Dog is a fairly straightforward side scrolling hop-and-bopper with above above average graphics, fairly well done level design and super fluid controls. Ultimately, it's not a very challenging game, but it's certainly an enjoyable little experience while it lasts. That, and the whole thing is WAY more enjoyable when you release it's basically an unlicensed, wildly re-imagined version of Turner & Hooch ... you know, based on the hypothetical original script that had Tom Hanks traveling to Antarctica and visiting Dracula's castle to save his beloved pooch. And interestingly, that's not the only allusion to a Tom Hanks movie you'll see in this one; my, where in the world do you think they got the idea for that giant keyboard mini-game?

My Score: 7 out of 10

#024

The Gates of Zendocon (1989)

Developer: Epyx

Publisher: Atari

There really weren't that many SHMUPs on the Lynx, so a game like The Gates Of Zendocon was certainly a welcome addition to its software library. While nobody in their right mind is going to be comparing this one to Soldier Blade or M.U.S.H.A., it's nonetheless a fairly enjoyable little side scrolling shooter with huge (we're talking Lightening Force-sized!) levels that defy genre conventions by throwing more vertically scrolling enemies and hazards at you than horizontal threats. To be fair, there is perhaps a bit too much level recycling going on and a lot of times, it's actually easier to avoid enemies altogether by floating towards the top of the screen, but if you are a genre purist, you'll still probably get a short-term kick out of it. Radiant Silvergun, this stuff ain't, but as a morsel-sized blast-a-thon, it ain't too shabby at all.

My Score: 7 out of 10

#023

S.T.U.N. Runner (1991)

Developer: Atari

Publisher: Atari

I guess the best way to describe S.T.U.N. Runner is part Tempest, part WipeOut and part Rad Racer. While in part or in whole this one can't live up to the lofty standards set by any of those aforementioned games, it's still a pretty fun little experience with fluid controls and a sense of speed so effective, you can't help but overlook the game's somewhat crappy pseudo-3D graphics. The core gameplay is about as straight forward as it gets. You haul ass down the highways of a cybernetic post-apocalyptic holocaust world shooting cars before they shoot you while periodically sneaking your way into inner tubes that allow for 360 degree blastin' and dodgin'. The cars handle very well and it's challenging without being too frustrating. Overall, this game does a surprisingly admirable job imitating its arcade big brother; indeed, this port may in fact be quite a bit better than it had any right being.

My Score:7 out of 10

#022

Blue Lightning (1989)

Developer: Epyx

Publisher: Atari

This was far and away the best Atari Lynx launch title and the perfect game to illustrate the handheld's impressive hardware capabilities. Sure, it really wasn't much beyond being a portable After Burner clone, but considering this thing came out just months after the Game Boy hit U.S. store shelves, that's still a pretty goddamn amazing feat. The controls are very fluid and the graphics are downright fantastic. Furthermore, the audio is surprisingly good and there actually is quite a bit of variation in the level design. With about an hour of content, it's definitely longer than most aerial combat games on the system, but without a multiplayer component, unfortunately, there isn't a whole lot of replay value to be found here. Regardless, it still holds up pretty damn well almost 30 years down the road - and somehow, it managed to be WAY better than the Atari Jaguar port(!?!) that came along half a decade later.

My Score:7 out of 10

#021

Xybots (1991)

Developer: Atari

Publisher: Atari

Even without that iconic, twisted-up controller, this port of Xybots nonetheless manages to mimic its arcade forerunner fairly well - indeed, with a much cleaner presentation, I'd argue this port is actually vastly superior to its coin-op inspiration! In this pseudo-3D action game, you run around shooting robots over and over again so you can collect keys to advance to the next level and kill even more robots. Yeah, there's not a whole lot of gray matter required to play it, but it still provides plenty of instant gratification fun. The 3D-ish levels aren't too detailed, but it's still pretty fun exploring the semi-three-dimensional game space. The two-player mode is a bit of a letdown, but you can't find too many faults with the expansive solo-player campaign; the game does chuck about 100 different levels at you, after all.

My Score:7 out of 10

#020

Lynx Casino (1992)

Developer: Brian A. Rice Inc.

Publisher: Atari

I'm not really a fan of casino video games, but this one was definitely a pleasant surprise. For one thing, you really do get a ton of mini-games to monkey around with, running the gamut from blackjack and craps to slot machines and roulette - hell, you can even get meta as fuck and visit one of the casino's many video poker machines if that itch ever hits ya. But the thing that really makes this one stand out is its weird, almost self-deprecating humor. Rather than paint Vegas as some sort of neon-hued paradise like other casino video games, the trappings in Lynx Casino are just scummy as hell, complete with appearances by morbidly obese Texan businessmen and a whole buncha' hoochies I'm convinced are canonically hookers trying to con you out of your moolah at every turn. It's a surprisingly addictive and surprisingly funny little diversion; it may not be a classic by any stretch of the imagination, but it's definitely way better than it probably had any right to be.

My Score:7 out of 10

#019

Joust (1992)

Developer: Williams, Inc.

Publisher: Shadowsoft

I don't think Joust constitutes anybody's favorite old-school arcade game (I thought the suspiciously unheralded sequel was better, anyway), but there's no denying this is a very, very solid port that's probably better than any home console port of the coin-op - and it's way better then the NES version, for certain. By now, you know the gist of it: you play a knight inexplicably riding an ostrich, and you fly around the stage bumping off baddies while also trying to avoid getting bumped into the fiery pits beneath you. The graphics, admittedly, are a bit on the fugly side but the core gameplay (complete with those intentionally slippery controls) feels very true to its arcade inspiration. That, and there are a ton of levels - I could never get passed stage 40, personally, so who knows how many more levels are included (I'm guessing a lot.)

My Score: 7 out of 10

#018

Klax (1990)

Developer: Atari

Publisher: Atari

In the pantheon of late '80s/early '90s puzzlers, I'd put Klax somewhere in the middle. It's not quite as memorable as Tetris or Bust-A-Move, but it's certainly more fun to play than stuff like Palamedes or Mendel Palace. The gameplay here is very simple - a conveyor belt keeps spitting multi-colored blocks at 'ya and you have to stack them in color-coded piles - but strangely satisfying at the same time. Presentation-wise it doesn't really offer anything you haven't seen in other ports of the game, but for what it is, it's nonetheless a very fun, engaging and instantly accessible handheld time-waster. And no, neither the controls nor the gameplay suffer from having to tilt the handheld upside down to play it - well, too much, anyway.

My Score: 7 out of 10

#017

Hockey (1992)

Developer: Alpine Studios, Inc.

Publisher: Atari

There aren't a whole lot of good sports games on the handheld, but the bluntly titled Hockey is a welcome exception. The game lacks an NHL or NHLPA license, so you can't play as Wayne Gretzky or the Detroit Red Wings, although ever NHL city circa 1991 is represented, complete with uniforms with color schemes that just so happen to correspond with their National Hockey League analogue. Gameplay-wise, it's basically a fusion of Ice Hockey and Blades of Steel, so if you dig fast and frenetic arcade action, you'll love the shit outta' this 'un. Alas, while the offensive controls are spot-on, playing defensively is a bit of a hassle and the virtual lack of anything even remotely resembling a season mode (or even a playoffs mode) really hurts the replay value. That aside, it's still a very impressive little hockey game, and probably the best portable representation of the sport until EA's venerable series hit the Game Gear a few years later.

My Score: 7 out of 10

#016

Robo-Squash (1990)

Developer: Atari

Publisher: Atari

There is no way in hell this game should be as fun as it is, but much to our jubilant surprise, Robo-Squash is one of the most unexpectedly enjoyable (and engrossing) titles on the Lynx. Essentially, it's a pseudo 3-D, first-person-perspective version of Pong, only with a whole bunch of shit littering the playing space (a'la Glove Ball on the NES.) So yes, the entire game is basically just you batting a little red ball back and forth across a screen, busting blocks and popping sentient, disembodied mouths right in the kisser, but somehow, it just plain works. Don't let the drab backgrounds or the generic enemy design fool you - this thing'll suck you in for far longer than you'd have expected if you give it it's fair day in gamer's court. Get it? Because squash is played in a court? Oh, fuck you, too.

My Score: 7 out of 10

#015

Battlezone 2000 (1995)

Developer: Handmade Software

Publisher: Atari

Although the minimalist vector graphics might turn you off, I assure you the gameplay in Battlezone 2000 is solid gold. Similar in spirit to Twisted Metal and all those other vehicular combat games (and, uh Combat on the Atari 2600, I guess), the object of the title is to - well, basically, just drive around the war zone shooting the shit out of everything that ain't you. The controls are silky smooth and the gameplay is surprisingly intense, and the whole experience isn't as cheapened by the Game Boy-esque visuals as you'd think. Add to the equation plenty of customization options and some downright exquisite multiplayer action (up to four players can blast da fuq outta' each other for hours on end) and you have yourself a very solid portable shooter that's probably worth going out of your way to experience at least once, pending you have a major hard-on for the genre.

My Score: 7 out of 10

#014

Toki (1991)

Developer: Tad Corp.

Publisher: Atari

Astonishingly, this is a remarkably faithful port of the obscure arcade title, and in some ways, it's even better than the translation Sega Genesis owners got (even if this version of the game drops the somewhat risque subtitle, Going Ape Spit.) Toki is sort of a hybrid hop and bopper platformer and side scrolling shooter, emphasizing exploration and strategic jumping and hot and heavy, projectile spittin' action. Granted, the combination isn't 100 percent harmonious, but Toki nonetheless plays very well, with fluid controls and well-designed levels. Naturally, the game does suffer from some flickering issues and some of the backgrounds are straining on the eyes, but for the most part the visuals - especially the enemy sprites - are just tremendous. Too bad the ride is so painfully short ... I managed to tear through this one on my virgin run in less than 20 minutes.

My Score: 7 out of 10

#013

Kung Food (1992)

Developer: Lore Games, Ltd.

Publisher: Atari

How can anybody hate a side-scrolling beat-em-up starring a mutated broccoli stick fighting killer tomatoes and carrots inside a refrigerator? If nothing else, Kung Food takes home the prize for most inventive (read: batshit crazy) idea for a Lynx title. And while the game has some obvious shortcomings (the hit detection is wonky, the enemies are cheap as fuck, the audio is fairly minimal, among a few other issues), the whole experience is just so much kooky fun you can't help but enjoy it despite its failings. The sprites are great, the level design is terrific and the whole goddamn thing ends with you punching garden snails in the face and going toe-to-toe with a Petunia that can somehow uproot itself and spin like a tornado. It may not be a great game by any stretch of the imagination, but it's certainly a kitschy, tongue-in-cheek genre offering that's hard to forget. 

My Score: 7 out of 10

#012

Robotron: 2084 (1991)

Developer: Williams, Inc.

Publisher: Shadowsoft

Well, you know what to expect here: so much goddamn blasting your thumbs going to have blisters on top of its fuckin' blisters, that's what. As long as you can tolerate the obvious graphical downgrade from the arcade original, this handheld iteration of Robotron: 2084 is nonetheless a fairly faithful adaptation of the coin-op standard, with constant action every bit as intense as its quarter-munchin' progenitor. While the lack of a multiplayer mode is a huge disappointment, you really can't complain about the single player campaign. Once you finally get used to the control scheme, you'll be blowing away baddies until your hands start spasming. Oh, and you better not even think about surviving past wave 50 - by then, the entire playing space is utterly inundated with enemies, to the point no matter where you respawn, you'll find yourself smackdab in a horde of bad guys who'll kill your ass instantly.

My Score: 7 out of 10

#011

Rygar (1990)

Developer: Tecmo, Ltd.

Publisher: Atari

While this shrunken down port isn't as good as the arcade game or the NES version, it's still a very, very fun game that looks great, plays great and actually has a bit more meat to its bones than most action-adventure games on the console. The levels are huge, the combat is exquisite and the boss fights (especially the one at the very end against that giant Ultimate Warrior lookalike) are all quite memorable, and even hardcore gamers will probably require an hour or two to finish it. It may not offer much in terms of replay incentives, but it's still a hell of a way to spend a short car ride - especially if you've ever wanted to play The Legendary Axe and its ilk on-the-go.

My Score: 7 out of 10

#010

Lexis (1999)

Developer: Shadowsoft

Publisher: Songbird Productions

Lexis is a game that combines two of my favorite games ever - Tetris and Scrabble. Yeah, another game (the curtly titled Wordtris) had the same gimmick, but this one just feels, looks and plays way better. The above description pretty much sums up the gameplay, and while the bells and whistles are a tad lacking, you can't say a single damn bad thing about the experience as a whole. Granted, I'm a huge word nerd so my biases may be showing here, but I had an absolute blast replaying this one - so much so that I didn't even bitch that much about having to tilt the Lynx sideways to play it. And before you ask - no, you can't spell out curse words or racial slurs in the game; I should know since I spent a good two hours trying to do precisely that. (And yeah, I know it's technically an aftermarket game, and I'm violating my own rating criteria. Well, here's the late, great Eddie Guerrero speaking on my behalf to explain the situation.)

My Score: 8 out of 10

#009

Ninja Gaiden III: The Ancient Ship of Doom (1991)

Developer: Tecmo, Ltd.

Publisher: Atari

If you want a game that'll make you weep about what could've been, this one's for you. Unlike the previous Ninja Gaiden game on the platform, this is pretty much a console-perfect port of the NES game, with graphics, sound and gameplay that's virtually identical to the Nintendo game - if not even better. Within minutes you'll realize that, had Atari played their cards a little better, they could've turned the Lynx into a portable NES, complete with a deluge of quality third-party titles essentially indistinguishable from their home console iterations. Sigh - somewhere, there's an alternate reality where the Lynx got one-to-one translations of Tecmo Super Bowl and Castlevania III and the handheld was supported well into Bill Clinton's second term. If you ever see me out on public looking forlorn, odds are, that missed opportunity is what I'm thinking about.

My Score: 8 out of 10

#008

Xenophobe (1990)

Developer: Bally Manufacturing Corp.

Publisher: Atari

If you only played the supremely watered down version of Xenophobe on the NES, it's no surprise why you never understood what all the hype and hubbub was about. Needless to say, the port we got on the Lynx is WAY closer to the arcade original, and with a more streamlined approach to gameplay, is honestly a far more enjoyable title. To be fair this game has a STEEP learning curve and there's more backtracking in it than the entire Metroid series combined, but it's also an incredibly fun and addictive arcade blast-fest with a ton of quirky idiosyncrasies (I mean, for fuck sake, you can literally play as Colonel Sanders, one of the Coneheads or a gun-toting duck named Dr. Kwak - how can you NOT enjoy the experience?) Basically, it's just you running around these tight corridors teeming with alien nasties, trying to blow away as many intergalactic pests as possible without running out of ammo, but there's a lot more nuance to the game than you might assume. The level design is excellent, the atmosphere is superb, the constant action is hot and heavy and if that wasn't enough, Xenophobe is also one of the longest action games on the system - whereas most of its genre contemporaries could be finished in 30 minutes, don't expect to wrap up this one in less than 3 hours.

My Score: 8 out of 10

#007

Basketbrawl (1992)

Developer: Atari

Publisher: Atari

THIS FUCKING GAME. I can see why most everybody back in the day took one look at the game's box art and said "nope, not even gonna'," but boy oh boy did we pay a steep price for judging this book by its cover. Simply put, Basketbrawl is goddamn awesome and might be even better than Arch Rivals, since it allows you to do all sorts of stuff you couldn't do in that game, like, I don't know, grab a fucking shiv and start stabbing your opponents, or send a dude with a baseball bat into the paint to bash the opposing point guard's skull in. In terms of audio-visuals (especially the audio, since it only has a couple of looping sound effects) it's a pretty ho-hum game, but trust me, the gameplay more than makes up for it. I mean, what other basketball game out there allows you throw boomerangs at people, use bags of cocaine as power-ups and GRAB A FUCKING ASSAULT RIFLE AND SHOOT YOUR OPPONENTS IN THEIR FACES? This game is absolutely amazing and something we would NEVER see on store-shelves today; and on top of all that insane shit, it's also a pretty good arcade basketball title to boot!

My Score: 8 out of 10

#006

Double Dragon (1993)

Developer: Technos

Publisher: Telegames

This game doesn't really play like the NES version at all, and really, that's to the game's benefit. The stages aren't as long and there are fewer enemies per stage, but the combat feels TOTALLY different. Each encounter feels extremely visceral, constituting mini boss-battles in and of themselves. When you punch or kick a motherfucker in this game, it feels like you're really landing blows, and fuck almighty does it feel oh so satisfying to back elbow dudes in this 'un. The graphics are great and the character sprites (despite some eerily feature-less faces) are huge and generally well defined, and the music sounds very reminiscent of the classic tunes we got on the Nintendo cartridge. It's not a terribly long game (you can finish it in about 30 minutes), but the core gameplay is just so much fun that I doubt you'll only want to punch, kick and pummel your way through the title once. Plus, it's worth going out of your way to experience just to see the game's idiosyncratic quirks - like the sudden arrival of a green Abobo and the game's ending cinematic where Billy (whom looks a lot like Beavis in this game) LITERALLY gets dry humped by his rescued gal pal!

My Score: 8 out of 10

#005

Krazy Ace Miniature Golf (1993)

Developer: Telegames

Publisher: Telegames

Here's a great mini-golf title that manages to do what relatively few golf sims have ever been able to - be a fun, instantly accessible game that DOESN'T revolve around an endless series of swing-meters and perfectly timed button presses. There's not a whole lot of technical depth to Krazy Ace, but what it does offer is supremely fun, simplistic and addictive physics based golf action, complete with some of the most ingenuous courses you'll likely ever see in a video game (yeah, you won't get attacked by giant whales or exploding canons in Tiger Woods, that's for damned sure.) And don't look now, but this is secretly one of the best multiplayer games for the Lynx - trust me, you have no earthly clue how fun it is to link up with three of your pals and go mano-a-mano against the game's ruthless chattering clown head and water fountain obstacles ...

My Score: 8 out of 10

#004

Super Skweek (1991)

Developer: Loricels

Publisher: Atari

I've played this game on several different platforms, but as good as Skweek/Slider may have been on the PC Engine and the Game Gear, his sole excursion on the Lynx is undoubtedly the best version of the game out there (well, except for maybe the Amiga version, but come on - who the fuck out there ever owned a fuckin' Amiga?) The gamepay in Super Skweek is deceptively simple: you play this adorable orange fur ball who has to transform all of the blue panels on the game space pink by walking over them. Sounds easy enough, right? Well, not so much, seeing as how there are tons of enemies (among them, suicidal penguins, fireball spitting Venus' flytraps and yes, even what appears to be members of the Ku Klux Klan) on the prowl to kill your ass dead. Each level is an exquisitely designed puzzle and there are a bunch of neat power-ups scattered liberally about so it doesn't become too intimidating, but it still packs plenty of challenge. Unlike some of the other versions of the game, this one has a legitimate story mode and the ability to buy upgrades (from a shop run by Frankenstein, of all things.) And its two-player mode, as the kids say nowadays, is absolute tits.  If you haven't played a Skweek game before, you're in for a treat - especially if your virgin run is with this refined and enhanced iteration of the stellar (and criminally underappreciated) series.

My Score: 8 out of 10

#003

Chip's Challenge (1989)

Developer: Epyx

Publisher: Atari

This was one of the very first games released on the Lynx and while it may not have been as technically impressive as some of its first gen cohorts, it certainly bested its contemporaries where it counted - in the longevity department. If you're looking for a game that's going to keep you glued to your Lynx for a long time, Chip's Challenge will practically weld your fingers to the portable, seeing as how it packs an amazing 144 levels in its compact cartridge guts. Although there's not a whole lot of graphical variance from stage to stage, the levels are so well designed and the puzzles so ingenious that you don't even notice the fact the background is really just Minesweeper repeated over and over. If you were ever keen on games like Fire 'n Ice or Kickle Cubicle on the NES you'll positively love Chip, as it cleverly weaves in all sorts of neat environmental challenges; we've got magnets pulling you each and every direction, conveyor belts zipping you all over the place, sentient chattering teeth trying to kill you and wouldn't you know it, some good old fashioned block pushing puzzles on top of a slippery sheet of ice ... which, naturally, is surrounded by a one touch and you're toasted inferno of virtual fire. This is just a fantastic little portable puzzler, and even if you're not necessarily a fan of the genre, methinks you might just get a bit more enjoyment out of the experience than you'd assume ...

My Score: 8 out of 10

#002

Crystal Mines II (1992)

Developer: Color Dreams

Publisher: Atari

Yes, I am listing a game produced by Color Dreams as the second best game on the Lynx. Sound preposterous? Well, clearly you've never experienced the hyper-addictive, puzzler-euphoria that is Crystal Mines II. Alike its unlicensed NES forerunner, this impossibly hard to put-down handheld gem is one part Boulderdash, one part Robowarrior, one part Dig Dug and one part Bomberman. You control an adorable little robot that has to dig, zap, saw and explode its way through caverns glutted with monsters, rubies and all sorts of hidden treasures and equally hidden death traps. And trust me, it's going to be a long time before you find everything the game has to offer, considering there's an amazing 181 levels to churn through. Admittedly, the music is a little annoying and the lack of any multiplayer modes is a bummer, but with so much content to experience as a solo player - with gameplay this captivating and habit-forming - there's precious little else to complain about here, whatsoever. 

My Score: 9 out of 10 

#001

Todd's Adventures in Slime World (1990)

Developer: Epyx

Publisher: Atari

Really, could anything else have taken the number one slot? Todd's Adventures in Slime World is undoubtedly the Lynx's tragically unsung killer app, and perhaps the best sliver of software in the platform's library to demonstrate just how amazingly ahead-of-its-time the system truly was. At a time when the Game Boy was giving consumers such piss-hued minimalist wonders as Dead Heat Scramble and Battle Bull, this instant-classic on the Lynx was offering players SNES-sized adventures with almost Genesis-quality visuals. With no less than seven different game modes (which really, constitute seven totally different feature-length games with totally different maps, enemies and items) the replay value on this thing was off the charts. Want a straight up-blast-athon? Set the game to arcade mode. Want a more cerebral challenge, that almost becomes a proto-stealth game? Logic mode's your boy. Want to test your reflexes? The timed "suspense" mode will have you on pins and needles. Conversely, if chillaxing is more your style, you can always play the "exploration" version of the game, which Nintendo would never admit inspired Super Metroid, even though the map system is nearly identical (by the way, this one came out five years earlier.) And if that isn't mind-blowing enough, the game even allowed as many as EIGHT players an opportunity to play the game cooperatively and competitively. That's right, Todd's Adventures in Slime World was doing LAN death matches YEARS before Doom, and not even the Sega Genesis port was able to cram as many multiplayer modules as this portable masterpiece. No game on the Lynx proved just how technologically astounding the hardware was as much as this title, and no offering on the system is as innovative, replayable and flat out fun as Slime World. This ins't just the best game available on the Lynx, it truly is one of the best handheld games of the 1990s - and if you haven't played it by now, shame on you. 

My Score: 9 out of 10

And that's that, folks! Personally, I had a hoot revisiting the Lynx back catalog and replaying some of the forgotten mini-masterpieces of yesteryear, as well as trying out scores of old-ass games for the very first time (even though most of them were just various shades of ho-hum, the really good stuff definitely made up for having to wade through the waves of mediocrity.) It isn't too easy finding Lynx hardware and software out in the wild, but thankfully for retro-collectors most of the games don't fetch too high a price tag on eBay these days. That, and you should have no trouble emulating the games if you choose to go the .ROM route, so really, you have no excuse for not giving the Lynx - the insanely ahead of the curve handheld it was - its fair shake. Tis a pity the Lynx never got the attention and admiration it deserved back in the day - perhaps had some major third parties like Konami or Capcom gotten behind it we could have gotten some truly remarkable titles, but as is, there's still a ton of good to flatout great software available for the unit. No, the Lynx library isn't just cutting edge tech for the sake of cutting edge tech, it definitely has some games worthy of going out of your way to experience, and here's hoping this countdown helped you separate the cream from the crap. Anyhoo, now that this thing is over and done with, what are you waiting for? Go on out there and give the Lynx the old collegiate try yourself, then come back and try to tell me it was, and I quote, "a crappy portable." The software speaks for itself, kids - the Atari Lynx fucking ruled, and we all ought to be ashamed for never giving it the just treatment it so rightly deserved ...

HEY!In the mood for more extensive, system-specific countdown spectaculars? Check out some of our previous "best-of" features below!

The 100 Greatest Sega Dreamcast Games of All-Time!

The 50 Greatest Sega CD Games of All-Time!

The 50 Greatest SNK Neo-Geo Games of All-Time!

The 50 Greatest Sega Game Gear Games of All-Time!

The 50 Greatest NEC TurboGrafx-16/PC Engine Games of All-Time!

Read More

Every Atari Lynx Game RANKED! (Part Two: #050 to #026)

Part two of a special three-part series revisiting, reviewing and ranking every single game released on the pioneering handheld.

By: Jimbo X
JimboXAmerican@gmail.com
@JimboX

HEY! Looking for the other installments in this series? You'll find 'em all at the links below:

PART ONE (Games #075 to #051)

PART TWO (Games#050 to #026)

PART THREE (Games #025 to #001)

The Atari Lynx is unquestionably one of the most innovative systems of all-time. The full-color portable was an absolute technological miracle, delivering gamers on-the-go polygonal graphics gaming 15 years before the Nintendo DS and PSP were capable of the same feat. Alas, the adoption rate remained far below that of the original Game Boy and even the Game Gear, meaning very few gamers ever owned the unit - that is, if they ever got their hands on the handheld at all. 

To mark the 28th anniversary of the pioneering portable, we here at The Internet Is In America are counting down EVERY single game in the pantheon of Lynx titles in a special three-part series examining the breadth of the unit's software library. Join us as we embark upon an epic quest to rank, review and rate all 75 official games released for the system, beginning with the suckiest of the suckiest and concluding with the absolute best the handheld had to offer (and trust me, there were some GREAT games on the platform - I mean really great.) 

Before we hop into the first installment, a few ground rules:

- Only officially licensed Lynx games qualify. That means unlicensed games, games that never got a commercial release in the States or aftermarket homebrews are ineligible for consideration.

- All games were rated on a scale from o to 10 and ranked accordingly. Factors taken into consideration included, but were not limited to, gameplay, controls, graphics, audio, level design, multiplayer integration, originality and replayability. 

- Of course I had to play the games using emulated .ROMS. You honestly think I'm going to spend all that money on physical copies of games that mostly suck dick anyway? 

- And lastly, your mileage may vary on the rankings and ratings. I tried to be as genre-neutral as I could, but some of my personal biases might sneak in every now and then. If you don't agree with the placements, feel free to make your own list and send me a link, so I can promptly never read it, you smug, self-centered prick.

And with those pleasantries out of the way, who's ready to get this portable Conga line shaking? Make sure those AA batteries are in there snug, folks ... it's time to party like it's 1989!

#050

Hydra (1992)

Developer: NuFx

Publisher: Atari

No, Hydra doesn't have anything to do with Marvel's gang of Nazi sympathizers (are they still canonically Nazis at all these days, anyway?) Rather, it's a pretty mediocre racing game that has you traveling down a river collecting balloons(!) and blasting random robots, all the while keeping a keen eye out for any precious jugs of fuel just floating around. The visuals really can't compare to the arcade version, but at least the controls are (and please, pardon the pun) rather fluid. At the end of the day, Hydra isn't a bad game - indeed, it's quite playable and accessible to just about anybody who knows how to hold the damn portable correctly - but it's not really anything special either. It'll keep you occupied for an hour or two, but don't expect getting much - if any - replay value out of this one.

My Score: 5 out of 10

#049

Viking Child (1991)

Developer: Imagitec Design

Publisher: Atari

Now here's an interesting one. Viking Child basically plays like a combination of Super Mario Bros., The Legend of Zelda, Bonk's Adventure AND the old Iron Sword games. Alright, that certainly piques your curiosity, right? Well, no matter how promising the concept sounds, rest assured Viking Child is bound to disappoint you. For starters, the graphics are pretty underwhelming and the animations are especially lackluster (indeed, you don't have a stabbing animation as much as you do your avatar just kind of flickering in place to kill enemies.) But what REALLY kills the game is the pace. Your character takes forever to move and buying items at shops takes minutes when it should only take a couple of seconds. On the plus side, though, it is one of the longer action-platformers on the system, taking a good two to three hours complete. Then again, that's not because it has two to three hours of content - it's because it has a half hour of gameplay that stretches OUT to two to three hours because EVERYTHING in the game moves at the speed 80-year-olds fuck. It may be worth a try for hardcore genre loyalists, but I think it's safe to say the rest of us can probably skip out on this 'un.

My Score: 5 out of 10

#048

Zarlor Mercenary (1990)

Developer: Epyx

Publisher: Atari 

There's definitely a dearth of SHMUPs on the Atari Lynx, but unfortunately, Zarlor Mercenary isn't exactly the sort of shoot 'em up experience we were looking for. While the game, for the most part, is a fairly solid shooter, it's also marred by a lot of bad design decisions. First and foremost, there is practically no wiggle room in the game, since your huge assed ship takes about so much pixel space and the game's levels are longer than they are wide. And since all of the stages are insanely cramped, and with a million jillion enemies coming at you at all times, that means death will be your constant companion. Making things worse is that the enemies are often the same color as the backdrops, so you honestly can't see half the things shooting at you until you bump your nose into their asses. Still, it's a game probably worth playing at least once if you are a genre fan - if absolutely nothing else, to experience the title's ambitious (read: absolute clusterfuck of a) four-player mode.

My Score: 5 out of 10

#047

Pac-Land (1991)

Developer: Atari

Publisher: Atari

Admittedly, I've never been a big fan of Pac-Land, but you have to give the game a little bit of credit for its foresight. I mean, the game kinda' did foreshadow the emergence of endless runners a good 20 years before the iPhone existed, didn't it? Alas, you know what to expect here. You play Pac-Man, now with appendages and a hat, for some reason, as you run really fast across rocky mountains and spooky ghost houses and forests where all of the trees are blue to get back to Ms. Pac-Man and Baby Pac. The only problem is, you have to this 20 fucking times in a row, with only the mildest of variations between levels. I guess you could say it's kinda sorta like Adventure Island, except nowhere - I mean absolutely nowhere - close to being as fun. Still, the controls are mostly decent and with a good two hours worth of content, it will keep you occupied on a long car ride, I suppose. Y'know - just as long as you aren't the person driving the car, anyway.

My Score: 5 out of 10

#046

Paperboy (1990)

Developer: Atari

Publisher: Tengen

The muddy visuals and warbled audio aside, this isn't a half bad port of the beloved arcade title. The controls are spot-on and the level design should be familiar to anyone who played the NES game. Pretty much all of the shit that made the coin-op so memorable - the old hag chasing after you with a rolling pin, especially - makes its way into this iteration in some manifestation, and all in all, I really can't complain too much about the overall package. The only thing that makes this an inferior port are the end-of-level obstacle courses, which are so shittily animated that it literally looks like you're doing BMX tricks on a giant turd loaf. And hey, where's the two-player mode, you fuckin' shmucks?

My Score: 5 out of 10

#045

Tournament Cyberball (1991)

Developer: Atari

Publisher: Atari

I never could figure out what the appeal of all these "robo-sports" games are supposed to be. It's especially befuddling in the case of Tournament Cyberball, a title with an ALMOST decent football engine that probably could've been finessed into a far better pigskin simulator. The graphics are pretty blocky and the sound effects are below average, but the controls (although they do take forever to get accustom to) are fairly decent. The multiplayer component definitely gives the game more replayability, but the lack of customization options - in tandem with a relatively paltry playbook - hurts it in the long haul. Fun in short spurts, Cyberball doesn't offer much beyond instant gratification arcade action - which, depending on your perspective, is either the loftiest praise you could give it or the most acerbic condemnation. 

My Score: 5 out of 10

#044

Dracula: The Undead (1991)

Developer: Atari
Publisher: Atari

This is easily the creepiest game on the Lynx, and there's no denying it's got some surprisingly effective atmosphere. The music is spooky without being too cartoony and the deliberately stilted gameplay pace definitely ratchets up the dread and tension. Alas, as great as the general ambiance may be, Dracula has some notable problems, beginning with the piss-colored graphics. Surely, the Lynx is capable of more defined sprites and a broader color pallet, so I have no clue what the hell is going on with the visuals in this one. Maybe they were trying to replicate night time and just made everything the same color as nougat? Eh, even if you can look beyond the subpar graphics, the gameplay itself is a bit too basic. Action junkies, do take note this is no Castlevania clone, it's a molasses slow adventure game that basically revolves around you opening drawers and chests for 30 minutes until the game just up and tells you "OK, you can kill Dracula now." That said, hearing Dracula's chip tune death screams might be reason enough to play it through to the very end, but take heed - once you beat it one time, there is virtually zero reason to give it another playthrough.

My Score: 5 out of 10 

#043
Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure (1991)

Developer: Atari

Publisher: Atari

Overall, I'd say Atari pretty much bungled the license here. The sprites are pretty good, the music is passable and the level design really isn't that bad. The problem, of course, is the gameplay. For starters, the hit detection is pretty crummy and you'll constantly find yourself backed into a corner with a bajillion enemies coming right at 'ya - and naturally, you're totally defenseless throughout the whole ordeal. Alas, what really sinks the game is just how frequently the same StarTropics-esque "appearing-disappearing-reappearing" block puzzle is (over)used throughout the game - hell, that probably takes up half of your playing time, and I'm not being hyperbolic for once. Still, it's one of the longer games on the system, and as far as top-down action-adventure games on the platform go, it's probably one of the less sucky. And as ho-hum as it may be, it's nonetheless better than the Bill and Ted game we got on the NES ... and by a considerable margin, at that. 

My Score: 5 out of 10

#042
Batman Returns (1992)

Developer:  Atari

Publisher: Atari

First, the good. The graphics in this one are great, complete with some huge and impressively detailed sprites. Secondly, the audio is really solid, with some of the best music to ever grace the short-lived handheld. Now, as for the bad? Well, that's pretty much everything else, ranging from the unresponsive controls, the monotonous gameplay, the absolutely pathetic hit detection (seriously, it's *yay* close to being totally broken) and oh yeah, the fact you can beat the whole thing in less than 20 minutes. Considering how popular the Batman license was back in the day, it's certainly understandable why Atari, at one point, included this title as the Lynx's pack-in game. Then again, if that was most consumers' introductory experience with the hardware, is it really any surprise the system wound up tanking worse than Oswald Cobblepot's mayoral bid? 

My Score: 5 out of 10

#041
Pinball Jam (1992)

Developer: Atari

Publisher: Atari

With Pinball Jam, you get not one BUT two video pinball tables to fiddle faddle around with, both of which are adaptations of two of the most beloved physical boards of the late 1980s: Elvira and the Party Monsters AND Police Force! The only problem is, a LOT is lost in the translation from the arcade to the Lynx, beginning with the muddy (if not indecipherable) graphics. So basically, the entire game is like trying to play pinball over a crappy MS Paint portrait made by a dyslexic fourth grader - a lot of times, you can't even tell where the ball is supposed to be, or whether an object onscreen is part of the playing field (like a bumper or rail) or just a part of the backboard artwork. Still, if you don't mind squinting really, really hard, you'll probably be able to squeeze out at least an hour or so of entertainment. And if nothing else, it's probably worth checking out just to hear the awesome chiptune music, especially on the Elvira table.

My Score: 5 out of 10

#040
Dinolympics (1992)

Developer: Imagitec Design

Publisher: Atari

Judging from the cover artwork - not to mention the fucking title Dinolympics - you might be inclined to think the game is just a ripoff of Caveman Games. As it turns out, the game is really more of a puzzler-platformer hybrid, basically what you would get if you merged Lemmings with all of those damn Dizzy games from the U.K (it would later get ported to the SNES and Genesis under the title The Humans, if the core concept of the game seems strangely familiar to you.) The gameplay itself isn't too challenging, and once you've figured out the lay of the land and how the quasi-clunky controls work, there's not much of a learning curve at all. All in all, you get a pretty hefty amount of content, but once you've already beaten the game there isn't much of an incentive for replaying it. Another pretty big bummer? The lack of any multiplayer modes whatsoever. All that said, it's still a perfectly fine game that'll keep you occupied for short spurts - just don't expect anything more than something that'll keep you entertained on a car trip and this one will likely service you just dandy.

My Score: 6 out of 10

#039
Desert Strike (1993)

Developer: Electronic Arts

Publisher: Telegames

I was never the biggest fan of EA's Strike series, but this is nonetheless a solid, shrunken down port of its 16-bit big brother. The controls are pretty good and the top-down strafin'-slinkin'-and-shootin' action is most certainly serviceable. Of course, the sound design is ho-hum (there's no in-game music, for one) and the graphics are usually pretty blocky and undefined. Furthermore, there isn't a whole lot of aesthetic variance from stage to stage, with most of the levels recycled, albeit with different colored sand. Still, it gives you plenty of content (three to five hours, depending on how quickly you nail down the control scheme) and the core gameplay - time to blow up Saddam's Iraq again! - is inherently satisfying and addictive. That said, is it worth the $300-plus asking price it demands on the collector's market nowadays? Eh - unless you've got Scrooge McDuck or Richie Rich money, I'd err on the side of nope.

My Score: 6 out of 10

#038
Gordo 106: The Mutated Lab Monkey (1993)

Developer: Tenth Planet

Publisher: Atari

There were a ton of side-scrollers on the Lynx, and while hardly any of them got anywhere close to Mario or Sonic in terms of quality, that's not to say that at least a few titles didn't put in a surprisingly decent showing. Enter Gordo 106, a shockingly competent platformer in which you play a simian crusader who prowls across multiple laboratories on a quest to free his test animal kindred. The graphics are bright and vibrant, the audio is pretty good, the sprites are impressively detailed and the controls are smooth and comfortable. The level layout isn't too bad either, although towards the end of the game it looks like the designers got lazy and started repeating patterns. It's a bit too short and easy to warrant much of a recommendation (even novice players will probably beat it in less than half an hour), but for what it is, it isn't too shabby. That, and it's probably as close as we'll ever get to a Dunston Checks In video game, so soak it up, kids...

My Score: 6 out of 10

#037
Raiden (1997)

Developer: Seibu Kaihatsu

Publisher: Telegames

Wait a minute, didn't I say I wasn't going to review any unlicensed games? Well, quit your bitchin', I've got an explanation for this one. You see, this port of the arcade SHMUP staple was originally developed by Atari and was scheduled for an official release on the Lynx, but shortly before the game was to hit the market Atari suspended support of the platform. That means the game was fundamentally finished as a complete retail product in 1995, but it didn't get a retail release until two years later when the Lynx was deader than Elvis (and even then, it was in obscure Asian markets, where for whatever reason, the handheld remained en vogue until damn near 9/11.) So it would've been an official Lynx release during its initial hardware run, therefore it qualifies for the countdown, dab-nabbit (also, the fact I couldn't find a playable ROM of Baseball Heroes would've made this a Top 74 countdown, and really, who's going to take that shit seriously?) Anyhoo, it's an alright port, I suppose, even if the enemy projectiles look like cheese balls and you have to turn your machine upside down and play it all retarded-style. It doesn't hold a candle to the best genre offerings on the Game Gear (or even the Game Boy, for that matter), but it's still the best classic SHMUP on the system. Hell, for that matter, I think it might just be the only classic SHMUP, now that I think about it a little...

My Score: 6 out of 10

#036
Rampage (1990)

Developer: Bally Manufacturing Corp.

Publisher: Atari

To me, the Rampage games have always been vastly overrated, and I suppose this handheld port is no different. Of course, that's not to say it's a bad game, per se, just extremely repetitive. That said, it does a pretty good job doing all the stuff it does over and over again, and in terms of presentation, everything is quite nice. The graphics are great, the sprites and animations are very good, the sound design is fantastic and a good goddamn, not only does it allow up to three players to wreak havoc all over America, it even includes an all new fourth character to the Rampage cosmos, a giant rat named Larry! OK, so maybe none of that sounds particularly life-changing, but it's nonetheless one of the better ports of the original arcade game out there - and Lord knows, it's vastly superior to the NES game, and it ain't even close, Bud.

My Score: 6 out of 10

#035
Turbo Sub (1991)

Developer: Atari

Publisher: Atari

Now here's a novel little shooter - one that allows you to do battle in the air a'la After Burner AND blast the shit out of underwater baddies a'la In The Hunt! Naturally, Turbo Sub isn't as good as either of those comparison points, but it's still a pretty enjoyable game with good graphics, decent sound design and largely spot-on controls. The problem - and while it's not a deal breaker, it's nonetheless something that hurts Turbo Sub a great deal - is that it's just too damn easy and way too damn short. You'd be lucky to wring 30 minutes of total gameplay time out of the experience, and of course, there are no hidden secrets or unlockables included to incentivize you to churn your way through the game a second time. On top of that, the two-player mode is a big disappointment, too. Tis a pity, 'cause with about half an hour of more content (and a little bit more challenge) this really could've been one of the better action titles to come out on the system.

My Score: 6 out of 10

#034
Checkered Flag (1991)

Developer: Atari

Publisher: Atari

Checkered Flag is basically just a souped up version of Pole Position, but it's not like that's necessarily a bad thing. In fact, this is a very solid arcade racer with great graphics and some outstanding audio (it's an autistic thing to notice, but trust me, this game has far and away the best transmission sounds of any racer on the Lynx.) The backgrounds are diverse and well-animated, and the courses themselves are pretty well designed, too. That said, the multiplayer mode is lacking and there just aren't enough customization options to keep any serious virtual gear-head invested in the game for maybe one or two playthroughs. Quibbles over the lack of content aside, for what it's worth Checkered Flag is still a fun and competent arcade racer, and probably worth checking out if you're a hardcore enough genre fan - even if the constant hairpin turn crashes are liable to make you toss your portable through the nearest window...

My Score: 6 out of 10

#033
California Games (1989)

Developer: Atari

Publisher: Epyx

If you ever played California Games on the Master System, NES or Genesis you already know what to expect here. All in all it's a pretty bang-up port that sacrifices very, very little in the translation to the small screen. And, in a weird way, that's the game's biggest problem - it doesn't remedy any of the major issues that plagued its home console forerunners. Simply put, the controls on the half-pipe and surfing mini-games are *yay* close to being totally broken, and the set-up here might be even worse than it is on the Master System and NES. That said, it still leaves two ridiculously fun mini-games, the BMX challenge (which, for its time, boasted some pretty impressive in-game physics) and the infamous hackey sack time-waster, which in addition to being one of the most preposterously addictive sub-games ever, apparently inspired the freestyle, trick-based game mechanics later employed by extreme sports titans like Tony Hawk. Throw in the four-person multiplayer and you have all the makings of a surprisingly enjoyable party game - pending, of course, you steer very, very clear of half the title's mini-games.

My Score: 6 out of 10

#032
NFL Football (1990)

Developer: BlueSky Software

Publisher: Atari

Would you believe this is the oldest living ancestor of NFL 2K? That's right, this was the first football game released by BlueSky Software, the developer that would go on to to make the Joe Montana series of pigskin titles on the Genesis. With that in mind, the gameplay does feel very similar to what we got on the Genny (right down to the camera zooming in on the players while running the ball!), albeit with considerably fewer playbook options. The engine definitely takes a while to get accustom to, but if you've ever played a game or two of Electronic Football you should have no problem getting the fundamentals down ... eventually. You get the full NFL license, but no real-world NFL players made the cut. Those of you anticipating Tecmo Super Bowl-caliber gameplay options are going to be sorely disappointed, as you have only a handful of game modes to tinker around with and there's no stat-tracking whatsoever. It's not quite the Madden-eqsue experience we were hoping for, but if you're a fan of very slow-paced arcade football action, you can probably make do with it; alas, if you're not a hardcore pro football enthusiast, don't expect this game to convert you ...

My Score: 6 out of 10

#031
Lemmings (1993)

Developer: DMA Design 

Publisher: Psygnosis Limited

Next to Tetris, Lemmings HAS to be the most ported game of all-time. Practically every console you can think of wound up getting some kind of iteration of the game, and the version for the Lynx is - beyond the obvious graphical downgrade - a fairly respectable representation of the Amiga-spawned puzzler. It's your job to resourcefully use a small cache of tools and weapons to lead your green-haired, coveralls-clad wanderers to the promised land, and you're going to need all the grey matter you can muster to keep these brain-dead dodos from ambling off cliffs and splattering all over the rocky terrain below. To the best of my knowledge, it doesn't add anything new in terms of extra levels or content, but it does give you an absolute TON of stages - enough to easily fill up six or seven hours. The lack of a multiplayer component hurts it, but as long as you have a penchant for fairly repetitive, slow-paced puzzling action, you'll probably dig the ever-loving hell out of it. That, and man, is it fun watching those little fucks explode - no wonder the guys who designed this one would later give birth to the Grand Theft Auto franchise, no?

My Score: 6

#030
Super Asteroids & Missile Command (1995)

Developer: Atari

Publisher: Atari

It's a two for one old-school arcade special with this cartridge, and if you're a hardcore fan of Golden Age gaming you won't have much to complain about here. These slightly upgraded iterations of the pioneering quarter-munchers are every bit as addictive and entertaining as they were in the early 1980s, but why oh why is there no multiplayer mode? I guess you don't need me to tell you the games are extremely basic in theory and execution and fairly repetitive, so if that kind of thing kills your portable boner, you're probably not going to get much out of this 'un. Old-timers, though, will certainly get more out of the experience than the whipper-snappers, so don't be surprised if you find yourself blasting away all those Ruskie missiles and space rocks for far longer than you anticipated. And if absolutely nothing else, it's certainly a historic game, being the last official title released for the Lynx and all ... 

My Score: 6 out of 10

#029
Ninja Gaiden (1991)

Developer: Tecmo, Ltd.

Publisher: Atari

Don't let the title fool you - even though this has the same name as the NES action classic we all know and love (and was indeed developed by the same people), this is not the same title. Rather, this is actually more of a Double Dragon clone than anything else, with all of the swordplay and shuriken-throwing replaced by close-range karate kicks and fancy backflips. While the graphics are great and the levels are gorgeous to behold, there are definitely some major gameplay problems, beginning with some very wonky hit detection issues. Secondly, the bad guys have a tendency to bum rush you and it is goddamn impossible to shake them off. And thirdly? The game is over and done with in about 20 minutes. Still, it's probably worth playing at least once to experience the very uneasy Shinobi-meets-Bad Dudes gameplay yourself, and let's not discount all of those unauthorized cameos, neither: name one other game on the Lynx where you get to battle an armada of Road Warriors cosplayers?

My Score: 6 out of 10

#028
Qix (1991)

Developer: Taito

Publisher: Telegames

Yeah, I strongly prefer Volfied, too, but its earlier arcade predecessor ain't too shabby either. Insanely rudimentary visuals aside, this portable port of Qix does a pretty serviceable job of replicating the coin-op experience, with extremely fluid controls and strangely addictive gameplay (you wouldn't think avoiding killer tiddlywinks while drawing random-ass geometric shapes would be such an engrossing experience, but it looks like the mad geniuses at Taito know better than all of us.) It has a two-player mode, but unfortunately it's about as bare-bones a multiplayer experience as they could've made it, and while the single player mode is fun, it just doesn't have enough variety or longevity to warrant too many pick ups. Still, despite its shortcomings, it's an instantly, immediately accessible genre-unto-itself offering that will give you maybe a couple of hours of instant gratification amusement. And hot Christ, does it beat the ever-loving dogshit out of that abortion of a port Game Boy owners got...

My Score: 6 out of 10

#027
Ms. Pac-Man (1990)

Developer: General Computer Corp.

Publisher: Atari

You know exactly what you're going to get with any Ms. Pac-Man port, and in a way, that's both the strongest and weakest aspect of the Lynx iteration. On the pro side, the game has very good controls, and the visuals - while obviously downgraded - are still bright, colorful and generally well-defined. I'm not quite sure how many levels are included, but in my playthrough I made it all the way up to the 12th or so stage, and even that constitutes a pretty hefty amount of gameplay time (a good 40 minutes, at the least.) On the other hand (you know, the bad one), the game's audio is pretty weak and there are no bells or whistles to speak of when it comes to bonus content or presentation. On the whole it's a rather decent port of the all-time arcade classic, but it nonetheless leaves you wanting more bang for your buck. And while we're riding this game's ass, what in the hell is up with those cutscenes featuring Ms. Pac-Man driving those little ghost motherfuckers around in a school bus? That's like, not even close to being canon and shit, I think.

My Score: 6 out of 10

#026
Battle Wheels (1993)

Developer: Beyond Games

Publisher: Atari

Years before Twisted Metal (well, actually, just two of them), this little handheld wonder brought hot and heavy vehicular combat to all five people who were still buying Lynx software in the year of our Lord 1993. Graphically, this is a downright stellar game, with impressive animations, sprites and projectile effects. Furthermore, the shooting-and-driving action is really well-done, with smooth controls, an excellent targeting system and extremely satisfying (albeit simplistic) demolition derby gameplay. The audio design, however, is a bit subpar and while the multiplayer mode is fun (up to six players can duke it out in death matches!), the solo affair is very repetitive, with virtually indistinguishable levels, dumb-as-dirt enemies that'll just let you shoot the shit out of them while they sit there stuck in first gear and a "story mode" that offers you only nominal options to soup up your ride. With a bit more polish and a one-player mode campaign that wasn't a glorified exhibition mode, this could have been one of the best titles on the handheld - alas, as is, it still isn't that bad, and is probably worth checking out if, by some great accident of the universe, you actually own multiple Lynxes, the corresponding cable connectors and know people in the current year whose idea of a good time is playing early 1990s handheld games competitively.

My Score: 6 out of 10

And that's all we've got for this installment of the countdown, kids. Hang in there and revisit the site in just a couple of days for the final installment in this epic, ultra-comprehensive look back on the Lynx ... trust me, we're about to get knee-deep into some truly outstanding stuff. 

HEY! In the mood for more extensive, system-specific countdown spectaculars? Check out some of our previous "best-of" features below!

The 100 Greatest Sega Dreamcast Games of All-Time!

The 50 Greatest Sega CD Games of All-Time!

The 50 Greatest SNK Neo-Geo Games of All-Time!

The 50 Greatest Sega Game Gear Games of All-Time!

The 50 Greatest NEC TurboGrafx-16/PC Engine Games of All-Time!

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