Showing posts with label Drive-In. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Drive-In. Show all posts

Friday, July 1, 2016

A Drive-In To Diversity?

How B-movies and exploitation flicks of the 1970s helped the masses embrace multiculturalism. 


By: Jimbo X
JimboXAmerican@gmail.com
@Jimbo__X

The term “multiculturalism” gets thrown around a lot these days. Alike all dogmas and doctrines, its definition is loosely-defined and what it entails, precisely, fluctuates a great deal from person to person. That said, the basic premise of the ideology is that it’s communally beneficial for everybody to respect the racial and cultural background of everybody else.

Now, for all of us Gen Y and Gen Z kids, that kind of thinking is almost second-nature. Well, duh, of course you are supposed to respect the belief systems and customs of people different from you. Why in the world wouldn’t you? Alas, such a mentality is still a fairly new concept in the American consciousness, which really, remained until very recently – and in some parts of the country, still remains – locked into ethnic enclaves.

There has been a lot of conjecture as to how “multiculturalism” became an ingrained, if not wholly expected, aspect of the American condition. Obviously, the demographical changes over the last 50 years almost necessitated it, as did the expansion of international trade. Some have said it is an aftereffect of neo-neo-liberalism – with its detractors accusing it of being a Trojan horse for globalization and hyper-political-correctness – and others declare it the end result of rapid technological breakthroughs (the internet being the most obvious example) flattening the “global village” into a much more interconnected place.

But me? If anything, I’d credit it to something a little less obvious – namely, the proliferation of B-movies in the 1970s.

“You mean to tell me that grindhouse and drive-in movies from the Watergate era represents the birth of the American multiculturalism movement?” you may be asking yourself. I know, it’s an absurd premise. Regardless, the fact remains that few cultural movements had as much influence on the public’s perception of diversity as the rise of the often-foreign and always-independently-produced non-Hollywood cult flicks of the disco decade.

In 1975, there was no Internet. Nor were there any smartphones or streaming services like Netflix. For crying aloud, you didn’t even have cable television or VCRs yet. And since the network programming back then was heavily censored to comply with the FCC’s super-strict guidelines, pretty much the only place you could see (relatively) uncompromised moving images was at the local picture show – and whatever they were showing was pretty much your only unfiltered media window to the outside world.

While the local cineplex was treating you to mainstream stuff like The Towering Inferno and The Aristocats, those who ventured to the local B-venues – namely, the scummier in-town, non-chain-operated movie houses and especially the drive-in theaters – saw something completely different. Through a deluge of cheap-o productions and even cheaper acquired films from overseas, the  non-mainstream-movie-going masses witnessed a mini-cultural revolution, screening hundreds and hundreds of off-the-beaten-path flicks furtively celebrating the pro-diversity, ultra-progressivist ethos that epitomizes current U.S. culture.

With the elimination of the Hays Code in 1968 (a downright puritanical film production protocol that greatly limited what could be shown on screen), the floodgates immediately burst wide open with all sorts of artistic, poignant films with declarative sociopolitical messages that weren’t previously allowed in the medium. Overnight, visually graphic films with mature plotlines like Midnight Cowboy, Easy Rider and The Wild Bunch became the new Hollywood standard, while outside-the-mainstream filmmakers now found themselves with free rein to pretty much show as much simulated sex and violence in their films as they’d like.

While this certainly allotted more thoughtful and provocative mainstream films like Last Tango in Paris and A Clockwork Orange, the relaxing of MPAA standards also proved a boon to indie filmmakers domestic and abroad. This was especially true for those who targeted the often content-starved drive-ins and grindhouses, which would screen just about any set of 35mm reels mailed to them.

America’s first flirtations with multiculturalism as a social construct wasn’t in the hallowed halls of academia or even the rapidly liberalizing mainstream Hollywood industrial-complex (which was seeing its gung-ho patriotic propaganda from stars like avowed racist John Wayne displaced by more morally relativistic and culturally critical films like The Deer Hunter and Dog Day Afternoon.) Rather, it was through all of those abstruse and obscure movies that served as the second half of many a drive-in and arthouse double feature, which not only gleamed real insight into the non-white world, but gave many people of color their first shots at financing, producing, directing and distributing their own works.

For most American filmgoers, their first encounter with international cinema wasn’t the critically acclaimed films of Bergman or Fellini. Rather, their introduction to non-American filmmaking came in the form of bloody Italian slasher flicks like Suspiria and The Twitch of the Death Nerve, Japanese kaiju flicks a’la Godzilla and Rodan and Hong Kong chop-socky masterpieces starring Bruce Lee and Jackie Chan – all the kinds of flicks ignored by chain theaters and lovingly embraced by B-movie venues. 

Modern black cinema didn’t begin with the works of Spike Lee, or even the films of Sidney Portier. Rather, the starting point for true African-American filmmaking began with drive-in baiting fare like Shaft, Superfly, Cooley High, Blacula, Ganja & Hess and especially Sweet Sweetback’s Badasssss Song, which was marketed with one of the greatest taglines in the history of the motion picture: “rated X by an all-white jury.

Think feminist and LGBT cinema started in the mid-1980s? One of the first U.S. movies directed by a woman to get any kind of wide release in the waning days of the Hays Code wasn’t some artsy-fartsy, pro-women’s lib screed, but rather, Stephanie Rothman’s campy, exploitative vampire opus Blood Bath in 1966. Beating her to the punch by two years was acclaimed filmmaker Shirley Clarke, whose 1963 drive-in potboiler The Cool World is now considered not only one of the greatest proto-blaxploitation films ever, but is deemed “culturally and historically significant” by the National Library of Congress’s National Film Registry. And where would American LGBT cinema be without the pioneering efforts of B-movie aficionado John Waters, whose groundbreaking late ‘60s and early ‘70s films Pink Flamingos and Mondo Trasho made their marks not in the bohemian galleries of Manhattan, but the grimy, rundown theaters and dilapidated drive-ins flanking the north Atlantic countryside?

Years before mainstream Hollywood film got on board The Silent Spring-spawned environmentalism bandwagon, low-and-no-budget shlockers like Day of the Triffids, Frogs, Kingdom of the Spiders, Piranha and The Prophecy were already indoctrinating viewers with the virtues of ecological sensitivity. And literally decades before the namesake became an inescapable academic construct, drive-in fare like The Last House on the Left and I Spit On Your Grave were getting down and dirty exploring – and criticizing – America’s “rape culture.”

That’s to say little of the genre classic that furtively explored deep, complex sociopolitical matters that mainstream film at the time didn’t have the guts to address, like rural racism (Night of the Living Dead), post-traumatic stress disorder (Deathdream) and the interwoven nature of cyclical poverty and the drug trade (The Harder They Come.)

Even the films that occupied that intersectional “safe space” between studio-backed populism and low-culture indie sleaze in the grindhouse era had a tendency to promote more progressive, anti-traditionalist values. Perhaps the ‘70s most iconic action movie star was Tom Laughlin's Billy Jack, an anti-racist, make-believe-Native-American “pacifist” who walloped bigots and spread the gospel of new-wave leftism in a series of three surprisingly lucrative films throughout the decade. Even the filmography of Burt Reynolds – the veritable John Galt of 1970s American cinema – carried a proud anti-establishment theme. Years before Black Lives Matter activists were doing it, the great mustachioed one was already criticizing mass incarceration and police brutality in drive-in hits like The Longest Yard and White Lightning.

While the double-dose of Jaws and Star Wars paved the way for mainstream cinema to strike back with less subversive and far more profitable box office rejoinders in the 1980s – which, as David Sirota observed in his book Back To Our Future, sort of swung the cultural gong back towards the side of conservative traditionalism through flicks like First Blood, Red Dawn and Top Gun – the exploitative, yet surreptitiously socially aware offerings of the drive-in age nonetheless reverberated much longer than expected. The influence of 1960s and 1970s grindhouse aesthetics and themes is evident in the work of celebrated contemporary directors like Quentin Tarantino, Robert Rodriguez, Harmony Korine and Takashi Miike, and it’s hard to find any critically acclaimed indie flick nowadays that doesn’t at least obliquely pay homage to one of its spiritual forerunners from 40 years ago (all of the shoutouts to the works of Herschel Gordon Lewis in Juno immediately spring to mind.)

So is it really accurate to say B-movies from the Watergate era are responsible for the proliferation of today’s pervasive, pro-diversity ideologies? On the surface, it may seem to give way too much credit to a medium usually thought of as hardly anything more than trashy entertainment. But again, each film represented a tiny inoculation of a non-majority culture, giving us just a pinch here and there of a different worldview and perspective on the modern American experience. Little by little – be it Carwash, Penitentiary, Caged Heat or The Slumber Party Massacre – we learned just a wee bit more about the cultures outside of our own purview, of the customs and beliefs and lifestyles of those superficially different from us. While mainstream filmgoers were – and to a certain degree, still are – receiving a steady diet of white, hetero and male, the drive-in and grindhouse film faithful were experiencing a greater easel of the human condition and a broader array of philosophical concepts all the way back in the heyday of bell bottoms and burning draft cards.

Sure, it’s absurd to think that today’s multiculturalism ethics – taught in schools, mandated by employers and considered a virtual social code of conduct as sacrosanct as what’s actually printed in our law books – arose from stuff like Infra-Man and Hell Up in Harlem, but without such early intercultural cinematic experiences, just how successful could the first diversity initiatives have been as heralders of today's ubiquitous multicultural Tao? Although sometimes hokey, risqué, perplexing and maybe even offensive, those 35mm introductions to different cultures and different schools of thoughts nonetheless got us thinking outside our own narrowed perspectives and looking at the world, and those around us, through less ethnocentric lenses.

The old B-movies of yesteryear let us see “the other” as something more than alien or exotic, in the process helping us understand different ways of life and thought and illuminating a larger, clearer portrait of humanity as a whole...

... yes, even when the pro-diversity message was sometimes sugar-coated with rubber monsters, kung-fu fights, gallons of fake blood and ample – if not downright gratuitous – nudity.


Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Drive-Invasion 2013!!

Classic Cars, Alabama Space Surf Rock, Veggie Dogs, A 35mm Print of “The Last Starfighter” and MORE!


There’s usually a lot of stuff going on in Atlanta over Labor Day weekend. Typically, there’s some racing going down at Atlanta Motor Speedway and there’s usually some SEC football of some kind going on at the Georgia Dome. Then, there’s the art festivals at Grant Park, and of course, all of the nerdy tomfoolery present at the Marriot and Hilton. That said, when I think of the Dogwood City and Labor Day festivities, there’s just one thing I can dwell upon: Drive-Invasion.


I wrote about last year’s Drive-Invasion, and I’ve written about the Starlight Six Drive-In explicitly on more than one occasion. That said, I really can’t help but NOT talk about it, because gosh-darn it, venues and events of the like are a dying breed, and whatever I can do to prolong their life expectancies is an utmost priority.

Most young-uns today will never know the joy of visiting a drive-in movie theater. Tis a shame, really, because I am now whole-heartedly convinced that there’s no better way to enjoy a flick than while seated behind the wheel of your ride, with a cup of popcorn in the drink holder and movie audio blasting out of your in-car stereo system. Really, it’s such a comprehensively American experience, an admixture of rugged individualism (technically, you’re not REALLY in an audience while you watch the movie) and full sensorial experientialism. You’re not just watching a movie, you’re experiencing something -- the night wind in your hair, the twinkling stars above, the occasional fistfight on the blacktop. And you can also smoke weed and have sex at a drive-in, which are two prohibited activities that are really, really hard to pull off at your local Mega-Plex.

Drive-Invasion, as such, is really a celebration of that drive-in mentality -- the pseudo-machismo, the not-so-pseudo scumminess, the car exhaust, the greasy hamburgers and of course, the completely unabashed aversion to class and cleanliness altogether. People pee wherever they want, walk around with their shirts off, blast antiquated surf-rock music during features and hoot and holler while watching utter trite in beautifully anachronistic 35mm. It’s a celebration of a dead America, and I for one, cannot help but want to dance on its grave like everybody else.


The festivities at Drive-Invasion 2013 began fairly early -- like, 10 in the morning kind of early -- but you know I’m not waking up that early for anything. This year’s musical set list was decent -- with a decisively awesome main act -- but by and large, I really can’t say I was too excited about seeing the 9,000 rockabilly acts that played over the course of the day. So, as I do every year, I arrived about three or so hours before movie kickoff time. And from there, the exploration doth begun…


Since it’s a drive-in, I suppose it’s not all that surprising that a large contingent of “classic” cars were on display. Maybe I’m lacking a protein strand in my Y chromosomes or something, because despite the perpetual cultural reinforcements (Tim the Toolman likes cars, so I should too, right?),  I’ve never really been what you would call an automotive enthusiast. I mean, don’t get me wrong, games like “Super Monaco GP” and, uh, “Al Unser Jr.’s Turbo Racing” are cool and all, but outside of the brief guffaw, I’m not really sure what the “appeal” of a real-life “shaggin’ wagon” is supposed to be.


As was the case last year, there were also quite a few vendors on display. My favorite was this one tent, that had an absolute hodgepodge of nostalgic nonsense for everyone to peruse through…no matter if your pop-cultural “things” are Ginger Spice action figures, “Happy Days” board games, books about Ed Wood or mini-posters of “Eegah!” which were clearly NOT printed off a computer and sold at the exorbitant price of $10 per art piece. Never.


Give these fellas some credit, though. I mean, in this one picture alone, practically EVERY conceivable pop culture base appears to be covered. Whether you are a fan of Halloween masks, Mad magazine prints, obscure vinyl selections, 1990s X-Men action figures, Elvis memorabilia OR Florida Gators paraphernalia, there was probably something at this booth that at least made you think about reaching for a ten dollar bill or two.


Oh, and if you were a fan of outsider art, devil worship, or "Friendship is Magic?"


There were even some unique folk paintings on display, in case you need to class up your man cave and/or Satanic altar sometime.


My favorite piece of kitsch this year HAD to have been this VHS copy of “Kiss Meets the Phantom of the Park,” the classic made-for-TV piece of shit starring America’s favorite media creation rock and rollers running around in suspiciously dark environments while family-friendly horror violence surrounds them. I’m not really sure if this here cassette was an authorized copy of the flick or not, but the gloriously awful box art -- which looks like something a Chinese bootlegger’s laptop barfed up -- is so hideously beautiful that I had clench my wallet to keep from tossing $20 at the cashier.


Of course, it really couldn’t be a celebration of all things white trash without some fine eatin’, and this year, we were lucky enough to have a couple of entrepreneurial foodies on site to provide us with some contextually impressive monster-themed comestibles.


You got to give it up to these folks: it's one thing to have a monster-themed food truck, but to have this much of a dedication to the gimmick is pretty damn impressive. I mean, "Wolfman's Nachos?" How could anyone with a soul turn something that awesome-sounding down? Alas, as a sorta' vegetarian, there was precious few I could chew on here, so I instead hit up the iconic snack bar's tofu veggie dogs instead. And if you've never tasted the gustatory joy that is tofu dog, golden brown mustard AND Texas Pete sauce together, you, my friend, really ought to re-evaluate your life plans.


The big musical act appearing at Drive-Invasion 2013 was Man or Astro-Man?, probably the finest sci-fi tinged surf-rock electro-punk-a-billy act to ever rise out of the depths of Auburn, Ala. While I may have preferred the dulcimer tones of prior Drive-Invasion headliners Black Lips and Roky Erickson a bit more, I have to admit, I was quite impressed by Man or Astro-Man? If nothing else, you have to really dig the audio-visual component of their stage show, which not only includes wall-to-wall sci-fi video screen mayhem but even an appearance by a Tesla Coil…which the front man then set on fire. Well, what else are you going to do with one of those things?


The real draw of Drive-Invasion, however, are the movies, and to some extent, I would be lying a bit if I said I wasn’t somewhat disappointed by this year’s crop of movies. For starters, they only screened three movies this year, when in years past, we were able to cram in four movies PLUS some Three Stooges and Bugs Bunny shorts before they told everybody to leave. And hell, one year, they even managed to screen movies for TWO full days! With that knowledge in mind, this year's trifecta of '80s sci-fi flicks had a lot less appeal to me than it would have for most folks -- primarily because I don’t like the 1980s and sci-fi is probably my third least favorite genre, behind high gloss action movies and big budget fantasies. That said, the set list was still fairly entertaining, and if nothing else, very, very nostalgia-inducing. To some degree, it was like camping out AND watching a rather ho-hum episode of “Monstervision” at the same time…it may not have been the BEST possible arrangement, but what you ended up with you really couldn’t complain about too much, either.


Movie Number One:
“The Last Starfighter” (1984)

Now here’s a flick I’ve seen on cable TV probably ten or fifteen times (which is still 30 or 40 less screenings than I’ve caught of such perpetually-aired flicks as “Problem Child 2” or “The Beastmaster.”) And while I’ve never really been a particularly big fan of the film, per se, I can at least enjoy it for its cheesy sincerity.

Having not seen the film in probably 15 or so years, I was a little conflicted about the overall movie. The first part of the flick -- which has our Kirk Cameron look-alike lead actor running around a trailer park and kicking all kinds of ass on an arcade game called, not surprisingly, “Starfighter” -- is actually pretty decent, but as soon as the film makes that great leap to sci-fi fare -- with the hero getting abducted by aliens and learning the ins and outs of piloting his own spaceship -- the movie starts to drag.

For those of you that have never seen “The Last Starfighter,” the premise, I assure you, is much better than the execution. So, there’s this kid, who gets a high score on this arcade game (really, the best scene in the movie, as it features a whole host of co-stars celebrating like it was New Year’s Eve or something -- complete with the stereotypical aged, black, rocking-chair bound sage screaming “he’s about to bust the record!” even though you know the director had to have kept telling him, over and over again, that the appropriate term is actually “break the record”.) Shortly thereafter, the kid is greeted by a dude dressed like a carnival barker and driving a pimped-out ride CLEARLY not at all inspired by “Back to the Future,”  who proceeds to offer the kid a job as an intergalactic space ship pilot. And interestingly, in the world of “Starfighter,” space ships are commonly referred to as “Gunstars,” which, for some reason, reminds me of a certain, iconic Sega Genesis title.

While the lead actor learns how to be “The Last Starfighter” (all of the others had been killed in battle, as it turns out), we’re introduced to the villains of the film, which are your common assortment of weird-haircut-sporting space Romans and crab-faced, laser-gun toting alien warriors. Meanwhile, the lead character has been replaced on Earth by a high-tech robot, which leads to some feeble attempts at comedy and an exploding pick-up truck.

The thing that I found odd about the flick was that, for all intents and purposes, it concludes with about half an hour left in the picture. Seriously, at about the one hour mark, the enemy alien spaceship has been destroyed, so for the next 30 minutes, it’s just the space fighter dude and his raisin-headed alien co-pilot buddy going back to the trailer park and saying goodbye to everybody and trying to convince the dude’s girlfriend to join him in outer space.

Allegedly, the film was among the first to extensively use CGI effects -- which, not surprisingly, look pretty shitty by modern standards. Also, the film was directed by Nick Castle, who played Michael Myers in the first “Halloween” movie. And the movie was supposed to have a corresponding arcade game released by Atari, but it never happened -- even if the game did resurface as a fairly mediocre NES game about five years after the flick was first in theaters.

So yeah, all in all, not really a great movie, by any stretch, but we could -- and have -- done much worse before at the Starlight. Much, much, MUCH worse, actually.


Movie Number Two:
“The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension!”

I’ve never seen “Buckaroo Banzai” before, but since the film has such a  vaunted reputation on the Intraweb, I figured it would at least be worth a gander.

For starters, the cast in this one is downright amazing: Peter Weller, Christopher Lloyd, Jeff Goldblum (who, for some reason, wears a cowboy outfit for a majority of the picture) AND John Lithgow, all in the same movie? That’s a recipe for quirky awesomeness if there ever was one.

Overall, I though “Banzai” was a mostly entertaining movie, but damn was it ever unfocused. It was like the producers of the film wanted to make the flick using about six or seven different genre approaches, and at the end of pre-production, they couldn’t settle on which one they wanted to use and just went with all of them. A comedy-sci-fi-romance-musical-satire-action movie? It works in parts, but as a comprehensive film, “Banzai” is mostly a maddening muddle of a motion picture.

The film largely revolves around Robocop, who is some sort of neuroscientist rocket-car driver who’s invented a one-dimensional laser gun that allows him to drive through mountains and enter a different plane of existence. The thing is, that same dimension is home to some nefarious alien beings, whom only Robocop can tell are aliens because he got zapped by extra-terrestrial lightning and can thus see past their Christopher Lloyd Halloween masks. Oh, and John Lithgow is a Russian nuclear scientist that’s working on his own extradimensional ray gun, by hooking his tongue up to a car battery and entering some supra-neural phase where he works with Japanese dudes building a space buggy that really don’t work right. And because there’s not enough shit going on, there’s also some hi-jinks involving Banzai’s new wave funk rock band and fan club and this one girl that was crying at one of their shows and later tries to assassinate him.

I’m not really sure what kind of movie these people were aiming for. It’s a little too focused to be a cornball parody film a’la “Spaceballs,” but at the same time, it’s just too affable to be a legitimate off-the-beaten path sci-fi satire, either -- think, something alike “Repo Man” or even “The Wraith” -- you know, that one movie where Charlie Sheen plays an alien ghost that drag races people out in the desert. Even so, the music in  “Banzai” is good, and it has a decent pace, and for the most part, it’s an enjoyable feature. Still, I think I would’ve enjoyed seeing something like “Critters” instead, but then again, I’d probably watch “Critters” then do most other things, anyway.


Movie Number Three:
“John Carpenter’s The Thing” (1982)

And we conclude our all-night cheese-a-thon with a movie that is rightfully considered one of the best sci-fi horror flicks of the 1980s -- which was made even better because the print of the movie the drive-in used was pretty worn, giving the entire screen this faded, blood-red hue. That would be a major negative for most showings, but considering this is “The Thing,” well…it’s actually an inadvertent stroke of blind fortune.

What more can be said about this movie? It’s well acted, the special effects are terrific (they actually hold up pretty well, even now) and the atmospherics are just grand. The suspense here is just fantastic, and it remains one of the better pictures under Carpenter’s directorial oeuvre. Yes, even better than “Memoirs of an Invisible Man,” if you can believe it.

The characters in the film are pretty flat, but since it’s about a bunch of gruff dudes just hanging out in the South Pole and being drunk most of the time, I guess there’s really no need for anyone to put on a Laurence Olivier-caliber job in this one. Kurt Russell does a rather commendable job of playing the exact same character he plays in every John Carpenter movie, and the rest of the cast -- which includes the black dude from “They Live” and Wilford Brimley in one of his few non-diabetes-mentioning roles -- is pretty good, too. Of course, the real stars of the flick are the ooey-gooey special effects, and as stated earlier, they do hold up surprisingly well all these years later. I guess my favorite bit is the part where the dude’s stomach turns into a set of rock candy teeth and bites that other guy’s arms off, but the poking-everybody’s-blood-with-a-hot-coat-hanger-sequence is pretty high up there, too. In short? It’s not one of my favorite creature feature flicks of the decade, nor do I think it’s as good as some allege it to be, but I ended up enjoying it a bit more than I thought I would. It was clearly the best flick of the night, and if there’s a better way to be sent off into the wee morning hours than with the image of Snake Plisken running around setting stuff ablaze with a flamethrower still dancing in your sleep-deprived noggin, I really don’t want to know about it.


And after all of those shenanigans -- the rock and rolling, the 80s movie watching, the soda chugging and putting down three tofu dogs in secession in less than a minute -- you HAVE to end the ordeal with a sound breakfast, no? As anyone worth a damn will tell you, all adventures worth setting sail for always end with an appearance at the Steak N Shake nearest to your house, and by god, there better be some blueberry pancakes involved, to some capacity.


And also, an order of chocolate chip pancakes, because as we all no doubt know, after 4:30 A.M, calories just stop counting.

Monday, September 17, 2012

DRIVE-INVASION 2012!!

Veggie Burgers, Flower Punk and Eight Hours of B-Movie Bliss…Does Life Really Get Any Better Than This? 


Every Labor Day weekend in Atlanta, dorks and dweebs across the Southland flock to this event called “Dragon*Con,” an all-out nerd-fest where unattractive females and lard-o men-children clad themselves in Hobby Lobby regalia and spend half of their yearly earnings on pointless crap no human being could ever possibly need. Conversely, it’s also a weekend where suburban weasels, ex-jocks and people that have never been to college flock to the Georgia Dome to watch the first week of SEC football. And if both of those things sound about as inviting as a case of HPV, then there’s this third option you can partake of in the ATL come the first weekend in September…pending you have the guts, of course.

Longtime INTERNET IS IN AMERICA readers should know all about my affinity for the Starlight Six Drive-In by now. Every Labor Day weekend, the theater holds this all day and all night celebration of all things white trash called “Drive Invasion,” which is quite possibly the greatest thing that’s happened to Atlanta over the last decade and a half. It’s a festival of sorts filled with classic car exhaust fumes and Savannah College of Art Design skanks walking around covered in fake blood and hipster-douches drinking cheap-o beers (to give you an idea of the target audience for this thing, Pabst Blue Ribbon is one of its primary sponsors) while no-talent punkabilly bands make shrieking cat sounds with their guitars until nightfall. It’s a glorious celebration of inner-city redneck-edness that’s equal parts genuine and synthetic; watching all of the shirtless frat boys hoot and holler at a 20 foot tall Kurt Russell may get tiresome after a while, but by the time you bite into that first veggie dog of the night, as a vintage trailer for “Fritz the Cat” blares through your in-car speakers, you just KNOW that you’re experiencing cinema they way it ought to be experienced.

The drive-in theater is very much in my blood. There’s just something about being able to watch a movie, underneath the stars, with the breeze in your hair, that seems so utterly perfect and complementary. There aren’t a whole lot of drive-ins left in the US of A, which is why I’m eternally grateful to have a venue as fine as the Starlight Six practically right next door to me. And when I’m offered the opportunity to partake of an all-night, 35mm movie-thon - a prospect sweetened by some quasi-decent local indie rock and snack bar cuisine that’s a million times better than it has any right to be - you KNOW full well that my ass is going to be there with bells on (or, more accurately, there with a trunk filled with contraband soda, but now we’re just getting into semantics.)


The premise of “Drive-Invasion” is really simple. Early in the morning, the gates open, and everybody finds a parking spot where they then proceed to crack open some tall boys, eat some ‘tater chips and smoke stuff that may or may not be the marijuana. There’s a “classic car” competition at some point, but honestly, it’s not that interesting (except for the occasional drag race between hearses in the adjacent parking lot, but management tends to frown upon things like that being discussed in a public forum.) From noon until 9 at night, a bunch of local bands - typically, some ironic country act or a punk-outfit fronted by Georgia State trust fund recipients - bang on their instruments, while Drive-invaders stroll (well, more like stumble and waddle) from vendor booth to vendor booth. Admittedly, I was kinda’ disappointed by this year’s merchandising opportunities, which was relegated mostly to some Etsy-quality jewelry and the aberrant tent with guys trying to get you to buy HD-DVDs and knock-off Godzilla toys. Also, people are allowed to camp at the lot overnight, so there were quite a few tents set up across the hinterlands. And despite the fact that the night’s itinerary including stoner-rock bands and four R-rated movies in succession (not to mention all of the rampant beer-swilling, acid-dropping and boob-exposing), there was actually quite a few number of children in attendance at the event. And for the parents that decided to bring their wee ones to this year’s ceremonies? Something tells me there’s going to be a meeting with DFACS in your future, very, very shortly.

Admittedly, the atmosphere here isn’t for everybody, especially if you’re a germophobe. Long story short, if you make flesh-to-flesh contact with anybody at the event, you’re probably driving home with a new STI, and for flip-flop wearers? At some point, it’s pretty much a guarantee that you’re going to nick yourself on a shattered Corona bottle, and if the absolute LEAST you get out of it is an updated tetanus shot, you should consider yourself extremely lucky. Yeah, there’s quite a few downsides to “Drive-Invasion,” particularly for those of us with more refined cultural tastes; even so, it’s such a cumulatively awesome event that I’d at least advise checking it out if you happen to be in town for Labor Day, if nothing else, for three very specific reasons…

THE ROCKIN’ FOOD!


You really wouldn’t expect a drive-in theater film festival to be a haven for quality, hillbilly munchies, but what do you know? Not only are there enough Slushies and liquefied cheddar cheese to drown a small village at “Drive-Invasion,” there are actually some VEGETARIAN options on tap, too.

At the Six, you have all of your usual options; nachos, popcorn, gourmet popsicles manufactured by some pretentious douches out of Buckhead…all of the expected stuff, really. But where things get a little unexpected is in the tofu department - where not only are there pseudo meat hot dogs and burgers at your disposal, but the options are, egad, actually kinda’ tasty.


As you can see, the folks at the Starlight Six take that extra step to insure that your foodstuffs are easily portable. These cardboard containment units are very easy to transport from the snack bar to your driver’s seat, and they actually hold a pretty sizable amount of food. This tray here could definitely hold a full meal for two, with additional room for two extra large soda cups AND a double load of napkins and condiments. And as far as condiments go, they really go out of their way to give you the best pre-packaged sauce deal in town, with relish, hot sauce AND spicy brown mustard sharing cubby space with the ketchup and mayonnaise.


As a guy that’s experimented a great deal with tofu dogs, I have to say that the meatless wieners at the Six are among the BEST traditional-style faux-dogs I’ve ever had. It’s extremely difficult to pull the tofu-links out of the water at just the right moment (probably, because the damn things never change colors in the transition from “frozen” to “boiled to a crisp”), but the guy at the drive-in seem to have that ultra-difficult art form down to a science. And if that’s not enough for you, you also have the option to load your tofu dog with nacho cheese, jalapenos AND chili, if the urge hits you.


Now, this veggie burger may not look delicious, per se, but looks, as we all are quite aware, are often deceiving. Granted, it’s a very basic arrangement - a lightly grilled patty on two all-white buns - but you know what? That simplicity gives the dish a certain gustatory quality that, in many ways, is far more enjoyable than if it was overloaded with extras. Besides, you have to take logistics into consideration here: you’re eating this stuff while nestled behind a steering wheel, and it’s not like anybody really enjoys finding iceberg lettuce chunks in their console the morning after…

THE ROCKIN’ TUNES!

This year’s “Drive-Invasion” was highlighted by two local acts - The Subsonics (a pioneering “raw rock” band that was doing the White Stripes sound a good decade before Jack White was) and Black Lips, one of the absolute best indie-rock acts in all of the Southland. The atmospherics here were just tremendous, and if you’ve never seen a middle aged woman striptease while a bunch of Atlanta natives sing songs about Frankenstein’s monster…well, you my friend, really need to start living sometime soon.

The Subsonics performing "Frankenstein!" 

The Black Lips performing "Dirty Hands!" 

The Black Lips performing "O Katrina!"

More Shenanigans from the Black Lips at Drive-Invasion 2012!

The Black Lips performing "Bad Kids," and a special message from the organizers of Drive-Invasion!

THE ROCKIN’ FLICKS!

OK, so there are a lot of reasons to check out “Drive-Invasion” every year, from the tofu dogs to the Atlanta punk acts to the classic car shows to the vendors trying to charge you ten bucks for a laminated picture of Dr. Who they printed off their desktop an hour beforehand. But the ultimate reason to attend the annual event is, of course, the opportunity to check out eight hours of 35mm film…and this year, the Six’s line-up certainly did not disappoint.


BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA (1986)!

If nothing else, you have to respect John Carpenter for his diversity as a filmmaker. There's not many people out there than can say they invented the modern slasher film and the modern action movie AND the modern sociopolitical sci-fi satire, but Johnny Boy has all of the above on his resume, PLUS out-there forays into all sorts of supernatural-themed material (which, admittedly, fluctuates from passable to downright shittaculur.) While a lot of people really revere this flick, I think it's just mildly better than average - as much as I love kung-fu flicks and horror-comedies, I just don't think this one merges the two genres as effectively as other offerings have. I'll give it some props though, for having some interesting character design and, of course, Kurt Russell's non-stop zingers, but at the end of the day? It's an all-right movie, but nothing too mind-blowing. 


BLADE RUNNER (1982)!

In case you're wondering, this is the original print of the film, with Harrison Ford's voiceover narration and the really shitty ending. There's no denying that this is a beloved sci-fi film, but truthfully, I was never that big a fan of the picture. While it's nice to see Ridley Scott exploring a lot of existential themes via a science-fiction perspective (not that he's trudging through the exact same philosophical material thirty years later), I think the movie hits too many snags along the way and never becomes too engrossing. That said, the art design is outstanding, and I loved how the film gives us a vision of a negative utopia that seems at least halfway plausible; it's an interesting film worth at least a viewing or two, but don't count me as one of the film's hardcore defenders. 


BLACULA (1972)!

This was probably my favorite flick being screened at this year's festivities, and it was at this point, around one or two in the morning, that I began hitting that wall where I was beginning to fade slowly in and out of consciousness. This, despite having FIVE dark cherry sodas in my gut, and at least two pounds of soy-meat from several hours earlier. Even so, I managed to push through the flick, which is definitely one of the better blaxploitation-horror flicks to come out of the 1970s (and I don't know if I will EVER come to grips with the fact that Blacula and the King of Cartoons are the same human being.) If you've never seen this one, I'd definitely advise checking it out - although seeing it on 35mm, while your girlfriend naps on your shoulder, while you furtively drip nachos down your esophagus without trying to avoid getting jalapeno juice all over the upholstery - is most definitely the optimal way to experience the movie. 


H.O.T.S. (1979)!

I think this one kicked off at around 3 in the morning. Not surprisingly, only a handful of cars remained in the parking lot, and I'm pretty sure I was the only person watching it that WASN'T strung out on Coors or Natty Ice. I'd never heard of this one before, and admittedly, I kinda' enjoyed it. It's your standard college-exploitation sex-comedy (think "Revenge of the Nerds," only LESS classy), and it was fairly enjoyable...but then again, I was *this close* to passing out on the steering wheel while I screened it, so take my praise with a VERY large grain of salt. If you've ever wanted to see a movie that concludes with strip football and a frat boy receiving sexual favors from a porpoise, you might want to see if this one is on Netflix somewhere. 

And that, in a nutshell, is why Drive-Invasion is one of the most fun things you can experience in the state of Georgia. As a kid that's never really grown out of that phase where staying up all night chugging colas and watching bad movies and fighting off the Sandman remains ridiculously entertaining, Drive-Invasion remains one of my favorite autumnal rites, right up there with staying up until 2 am on a work night to watch the Raiders first game of the season and sipping on that first Pumpkin Spice Latte of the fall. In fact, this Drive-Invasion thing might just be my new official marker to gauge when summer ends and fall kicks off...and if you're ever in the ATL in early September, I reckon it's a ritual you'd be downright foolish to avoid participating in.

Monday, June 11, 2012

Rock & Roll MonsterBash 2012!

Offensive punk rock, horror memorabilia, pro wrestling, chicks painted green and a 35mm screening of “Return of the Living Dead” - does life really get any better than this? 


Every now and then, you stumble across a flyer that you absolutely cannot turn away from. Case in point; this one for this year’s Rock & Roll MonsterBash.


You know, just seeing the Tar-Man’s face on anything is enough to get me to open up my wallet, but there are just so many keywords on the poster that just scream “awesome event happening soon, and you need to be there.” Planet of the Apes, Dead Elvis, Monster Championship Wrestling…as just standalone terms, every one of these would most likely pique my interests, but when you lob all of them together on one broadsheet? Yeah, you’ve got my money, easy.

Any long term reader of this blog knows about my adulation for Atlanta’s Starlight Six Drive-In, and if you live in the area and haven’t been there - for whatever stupid reason - you really need to visit it the first chance you get. The atmosphere there is so utterly fantastic that, personally, I have a hard time going to indoor movies now. Yeah, yeah, all you youngsters may think it’s “cool” and “with it” to shell out 40 bucks to watch a movie in IMAX, but for just half that price, you and your best girl could go to the Starlight Six and see TWO movies AND order three tofu dogs a piece…and hell, since it’s a drive-in, you can even take off your pants, if you feel like you have to. Try doing that at an AMC Theater, amigos.

Now, you may be wondering what a “Rock & Roll MonsterBash” is, exactly. Well, other than simply labeling the entire thing, as a collective idea, as “effing awesome,” it’s a Halloween-in-June type festival featuring just about everything you can think of that’s great in existence. You’ve got monster movies in 35mm on a jumbo screen, live music from underground bands that are generally pretty entertaining, about ten bajillion tents set up with all sorts of wacky miscellanea for sale, barbecued soy dogs for $2 a pop, and tons of Georgia State coeds running around in the trashiest outfits this side of  a Rob Liefeld comic. Like I said earlier - it’s pretty much the best idea for anything ever in history.


Since I arrived at the event around late evening, I actually managed to see what the environment looks like - funnily, I have a hard time making out black inscriptions on grey buildings at 1 in the morning. The attention to detail, as you will soon see, is absolutely amazing - not only are the projection houses covered in some of the dopest looking B-movie murals you’ll ever see, the screens THEMSELVES are emblazoned with artwork dedicated to Mecha-Godzilla and “Robot Monster.” It’s the sort of small touches that make the drive-in one of the coolest damn places in Atlanta…if not the entire US of A.


The snack bar, as you can see, was decorated to the hilt for the festivities, complete with a crucified skeleton greeting guests in search of some extra-chili doused nachos. Despite the rather risqué atmosphere, there were a ton of kids present for this year’s event - so yeah, those eight-year-olds either have the best parents in metro Atlanta, or the absolute worst.


As one of the movies being screened that evening was the legendary 1985 horror comedy masterpiece “Return of the Living Dead,” there was a TON of zombie-related shenanigans going on. If you ever wanted to see a bunch of nose-ringed twenty-year olds running around in fake-blood-soaked school girl uniforms, well, it looks like you’ll have to wait your turn until next year, Holmes. Oh, and this tent gets bonus points times five for keeping things canonical, obviously.


As far as the demographical makeup of the event goes, well…let’s just say, you get some very interesting people in attendance. From camera-wielding lookie-loos to costumed wallflowers to shirtless dudes that are clearly inebriated, there’s a pretty vast cross-section of people you’ll find at events of the like. And yes, I’d accept Friend Requests from all of you, if you just so happen to be reading this.


Ever the kitsch enthusiast, I was pleasantly surprised by the vast array of niche memorabilia (read: worthless crap) for sale at the event. Never has there been so much purposeless, tacky junk congregated into such a compact space before; and incidentally, never have I had the urge to just fling open my wallet and just start throwing twenty dollar bills at people for random knickknacks.


Action figures, out of print CDs, jigsaw puzzles, VHS boxes, mini-posters some dude just printed off his computer and asked fifteen bucks for; you name it, and it was probably available for purchase at MonsterBash. I guess my absolute favorite items on display where these mini pumpkin tins - and in case you were wondering, I did in fact end up purchasing that really tall one.


I guess the most ingenious item to be found were these laminated “security badges” featuring the likeness of practically every single fictitious character ever. Whether you’re into “Buffy” or “Phantasm,” there was bound to be at least one or two ID cards on display that you at least thought about picking up…and that one “S-Mart” tag featuring Bruce Campbell almost ended up becoming a permanent part of my wardrobe.


“Obscure,” I think, was the name of the game at the MonsterBash wares section. And if there’s one thing out there more off-kilter than an action figure in the likeness of one of continental Europe’s greatest composers…


…it has to be a children’s board game based upon a soap opera where adultery constitutes 98 percent of the show’s plotlines. If this thing is on Etsy, expect a full review sometime before the summer’s over.

Prior to the screenings, event-goers were treated to the one-two combo of monster-themed professional wrestling and a concert featuring North Carolina shock-punk legends Dead Elvis. The wrestling main event - featuring stars from Atlanta’s very own Platinum Championship Wrestling - just so happened to feature the resurrected corpses of the Von Erich family taking on an up-and-coming young tag-team called “The Washington Bullets.” And yes, I did manage to get the complete match recorded, as if you even needed to ask.


Granted, outdoing a tag team bout featuring undead WWA legends is a tough task, but I think we can all agree that Dead Elvis - one of the few truly iconic punk outfits from the southland - put on a truly spectacular performance that evening. Indeed, just one song from the night’s festivities will not do, so here are multiple videos featuring the band doing what they do best. And in advance: yeah, you’re probably going to be offended.





And of course, the night was capped off by a double bill of “Planet of the Apes” and “Return of the Living Dead.” For some reason, there was a twenty minute documentary about the 1970s version of “The Island of Dr. Moreau” played before the first feature, primarily because…uh, they had it on hand? Yeah, that’s probably why.


Believe it or not, this was my first time seeing “Planet of the Apes” the whole way through, and I really liked it. I always sort of thought the movie was a thinly veiled allegory for racism, but after actually watching it, I am 110 percent convinced that the entire thing is the literalization of the Scopes Monkey Trial. Seriously, watch the movie back to back with “Inherit the Wind,” and then tell me they’re not the same damn story. And at this point, I don’t think there’s really anything more I can add to the reverence behind “Return of the Living Dead,” outside of saying that it may very well be the absolute best zombie movie of the 1980s - in my book, it’s easily on par with “Re-Animator” and “The Beyond,” if not better than both pictures. So yeah, if you haven’t seen it before…what the hell are you waiting for, man?

Although it really goes without saying, I had an absolute blast at MonsterBash 2012, and can’t wait until next year’s festivities. Thankfully, there is a similar event - the world-famous Drive-Invasion all night movie-thon - this Labor Day weekend, so if you’re an able bodied Atlantan, you really have no excuse to not be at the Starlight Six come early September.

But uh, just remember one thing; BRING A SET OF JUMPER CABLES. I mean, seriously, folks. Seriously…