Thursday, October 6, 2011

And In Case You Forgot, Steve Jobs Was a Real Jerk, Too.

Remembering the life and times of Steve Jobs (by the way, he was kind of an a-hole)

As the world (and by "world," I mean a mass gaggle of techno-nerd hipsters that seem to equate consumer penchant with tactile values and personality traits) mourns the somewhat unexpected passing of Steve "Big Daddy" Jobs, I too, feel as if we should take the time to reflect on the life and times of the Apple mastermind...

...primarily, the fact that he was one of the biggest jerks that has ever lived. Ever.

Odds, are you'll probably be hearing a whole heck of a lot about the iPod and the iPad and MacBook today, but you probably won't be hearing too much about the OTHER Steve Jobs. . .you know, the bipolar maniupulator that wasn't above doing home invasions and holding employees hostage to get a point across. (And oh yeah, there's a strong likelihood that he stole some dude's liver, too, in case you haven't heard about it.)

Whoa, hold on, amigo. I'm not saying all of that just to ruffle a few feathers (lest the upset spill their $7 dollar Starbuck$ mocha-frappa-crapp-achino on their $700 dollar laptop, of course), but just parroting the words of one Alan Deutschman, whose 2000 book "The Second Coming of Steve Jobs" pretty much told us what we all suspected (OK, knew for a fact) about the Jobster.

Here are a just few choice cuts from Deutcshman's eleven year old character assassination/hatchet job/big, fat dosage of truth:

So later on this evening, when you hear some "in-the-know" tech-savvy consumer-crat go on and on about how much of a "visionary" and "genius" Jobs was, just remind them that behind the "Great Man myth," there was a guy that was, for all intents and purposes, a major league butt hole. Hey, you might as well get your shots in early, since it looks like we're destined for the biggest maelstrom of retroactive, post-mortem public adulation since a certain uni-gloved, monkey-owning alleged sex-offender bought the farm a couple of years back. . . 

R.I.P, Steven Paul Jobs (02-24-1955 - 10-05-11)

1 comment:

  1. He's a magician, how else could someone influence so many people to buy substandard laptops ? Yes, I know Apple is the love brand of devout liberals.