2017 NCAA Football Top 25 Rankings (Week 8!)

USA Today and the A.P. can take a hike - these are the only college football rankings anybody ought to care about.

By: Jimbo X
JimboXAmerican@gmail.com
@JimboX

Do you honestly respect the opinions of organizations like ESPN or USA Today to give it to you straight about college football? Of course you don't, which is where The Internet In America's 2017 NCAA Football Top 25 Rankings come into play. Every Wednesday throughout the '17 season we'll post our own selections for the best teams in college football, complete with hilariously un-P.C. (yet surprisingly thorough) recaps of their last games as well as a brief preview of their upcoming contests. Plus, we're throwing in a whole bunch of animated GIFs you can steal and post elsewhere on the 'net, because we're cool like that. Simply put, you won't get better NCAA football analysis anywhere on the Internet - and if anybody else dare claims their rankings are more authoritative, you proudly have my permission to go to their corporate offices and take a big fat stankin' shat right on their doorsteps. And with all of that out of the way, who's ready to revisit the week that was in the best kind of football there is - the one with unpaid black people without due process in rape accusations?

#01

Alabama (8-0)

Next Opponent: vs. LSU (Nov. 4)

Yeah, it's getting pretty hard to come up with new ways to say "well, Alabama just butt fucked another SEC team this weekend." It wasn't even close in Saturday's 45-7 domination of Tennessee, as Alabama's quarterbacks combined for 332 passing yards, which eclipses the total number of passing yards racked up by Vols' QB Jarrett Guarantano (44 yards on 9 completions) more than seven-fold. The rushing differential was just as one-sided; while Alabama was able to post 272 yards and four touchdowns on the ground, Tennessee could only manage 64 yards running the ball all day long. 

#02

Penn State (7-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Ohio State (Oct. 28)

With their 42-13 mudhole stompin' of Michigan, Penn State puts themselves in pole position of the Big 10, with this weekend's showdown against Ohio State possibly serving as a de facto conference championship game (and perhaps even a national championship playoffs eliminator.) Both Trace McSorely and Saquon Barkley shined in the one-sided drubbing of the Wolverines; McSorely finished the game 17 for 26 for 282 yards and a one-to-one TD-to-INT ratio while Barkley wrapped up the contest with 108 yards and two scores on 15 carries.

#03

TCU (7-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Iowa State (Oct. 28)

Saturday's TCU vs. Kansas game was every bit as one-sided as we thought it would be. In the 43-nothin' laugher, Kenny Hill accumulated five passing touchdowns on the day, going 19 for 26 for 278 yards. And, as the score would suggest, the Horned Frogs' defense positively shut down the Jayhawks, holding the helpless, hapless team to just 46 yards passing and a mind-breakingly terrible negative 25 yards rushing.

#04

Georgia (7-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Florida (Oct. 28)

The Bulldogs took a breather ahead of this Saturday's hootenanny with Florida, which might just be the game that gives Georgia the SEC East crown by default, thus propelling them towards an inevitable clash with Alabama for all the marbles come the first week of December. At the midpoint of the season, Georgia is averaging 454 yards per game, making them college ball's 37th most potent offense. Holding their opponents to just 253 yards per contest, the Bulldogs' D is ranked third overall in the country.

#05

Wisconsin (7-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Illinois (Oct. 28)

The Terrapins didn't put up much of a fight with the Badgers, whom easily dispatched Maryland 38-13 over the weekend. Alex Hornibrook went 16 for 24 for Wisconsin, ultimately collecting 225 yards, two touchdowns and one interception on the day. Running the ball, the Badgers wound up accumulating 215 yards and two scores, with top back Jonathan Taylor registering 126 yards and one end zone visit on 22 carries.

Huh. I didn't know quarterbacks were allowed to use the old Triple H jumping knee attack from No Mercy on the Nintendo 64.

#06

Miami (6-0)

Next Opponent: vs. UNC (Oct. 28)

Malik Rosier had a big day in Miami's 27-19 win over Syracuse. The Hurricanes QB finished the outing 26 for 43 for 344 yards and two touchdown passes, with receivers Ahmmon Richards and Christopher Herndon IV each chalking up almost 100 yards apiece. And on the other side of the pigskin, Travis Homer propelled Miami to 136 total rushing yards on the day, finishing the contest with 95 yards and one TD on 20 carries. 

#07

South Florida (7-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Houston (Oct. 28)

Tulane may have outpaced South Florida in the air in the Bulls' 34-28 win Saturday, but USF definitely controlled the run game. While the Green Wave managed to accumulate 221 passing yards (compared to just 127 for USF), the Bulls nonetheless ran all over Tulane's defense, racking up 378 rushing yards and three trips to the end zone. South Florida QB Quinton Flowers ultimately concluded the game with three touchdowns - two lobbing the rock and one he picked up as part of his stellar 138-yard rushing day.

#08

Central Florida (6-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Austin Peay (Oct. 28)

With each team posting dead even rushing numbers, UCF's more dynamic passing game was what gave them a leg up on Navy in Saturday's 31-21 victory. McKenzie Milton went 15 for 23 for 233 yards, plus another 47 running the ball. Meanwhile, Midshipmen QB Zach Abey could only chalk up 115 yards on two completions, though he did manage to scramble for 136 yards and one rushing score.

#09

Ohio State (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Penn State (Oct. 28)

After drubbing Nebraska 56-14 two weeks ago, the Buckeyes sat on the sidelines Saturday ahead of their pivotal Oct. 28 clash with Penn State. Not only would a victory give Ohio State control of the Big 10 East, it would almost certainly pencil them in as one of the two teams participating in the conference championship. You know, pending they don't hunch the pooch and drop a game against Iowa or Illinois in the final four weeks of the season. Which couldn't possibly happen, right?

#10

NC State (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Notre Dame (Oct. 28)

The Wolfpack was yet another team taking a breather over the weekend, but they've got a big one coming up this Saturday: an absolutely massive, gargantuan road trip to Notre Dame. And one week after that, they've got an equally tough home stand with Clemson coming to town. Of course, it's no guarantee, but if NC State beats N.D. and Clemson back-to-back, they'd HAVE to be considered a lock for the ACC Atlantic crown. And to think - with all of the hype Louisville, FSU and the Tigers had coming into the season, who'd ever imagined the goddamn fuckin' Wolfpack would be in the conference championship game?

The last time the Catholics laid the smack down this bad they owed some alter boys some serious hush money.

#11

Notre Dame (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. NC State (Oct. 28)

Brandon Wimbush had a hell of a game in Satuday's 49-14 poleaxing of USC. Throwing the ball, he went 9 for 19 for 120 yards and two touchdown passes, and running the rock he wrapped up the affair with 106 yards and two touchdowns on 14 carries. But don't overlook the gloriously underrated regular running back for the Irish; Josh Adams looked just as good as Notre Dame's QB, finishing the outing with 191 yards and three touchdown passes on 19 touches.

#12

Clemson (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Georgia Tech (Oct. 28)

Clemson took a breather over the weekend - which, following their upset loss to Syracuse, was probably much needed. They return this Saturday for an in-conference scrap with Georgia Tech, which is followed up by a road trip to NC State just a week later. At the midway point of the season, Clemson (averaging 449 yards a game) has Division I-A ball's 41st-ranked offense. Allowing 289 yards per game, their defense ranks 10th overall in the nation.

#13

Washington (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. UCLA (Oct. 28)

Yep, Washington was yet another top-ranked team sitting on the (proverbial) sidelines last Saturday. Following their perplexing 13-7 upset loss to Arizona State two weeks back, the Huskies re-enter the fray this weekend with a tilt against UCLA. Allowing just 237 yards per game, Washington has college football's second best defense; however, averaging 449 yards per game on their own end, their offense is ranked 42nd-overall. (And before you ask, no less than six teams have a 449 yards-per-game average at this point in the season. And no, I have no idea why ESPN ranks UMass at No. 39 and Georgia Tech at No. 43, despite having the exact same stats, either.)

#14

Washington State (7-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Arizona (Oct. 28)

A week after their hilariously awful 37-3 loss to Cal, the Cougars bounced back with a bruising 28-0 shutout of Colorado. In the one-sided shellacking, Luke Falk went 17 for 34 for 197 yards and three touchdown passes, while top back Jamal Morrow finished the game with 73 yards and one touchdown on 11 carries. And the defense, naturally, looked plum dandy, holding the Buffaloes to just 94 yards passing and only 80 rushing.

#15

Oklahoma (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Texas Tech (Oct. 28)

In a shockingly close 42-35 win over Kansas State, Oklahoma wound up winning the whole kit and caboodle following a long touchdown run from Rodney Anderson (147 yards, 19 carries) with just seven seconds left on the clock. Stats-wise, Baker Mayfield was positively brilliant. Passing the ball, he had 410 yards and two touchdown passes on 32 completions, and running the rock, he posted another 69 yards plus two more trips to the end zone. Still, this team's ability to stop scrambling quarterbacks is atrocious; not only did the Sooners let Alex Delton throw the ball for 144 yards, they also let him run all over 'em for 142 yards and three rushing touchdowns.

Now that's how you end a ball game - by making people in Kansas even more depressed than usual.

#16

Oklahoma State (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. West Virginia (Oct. 28)

It may have taken overtime to do it, but the Cowboys nonetheless pulled out the W against Texas. Mason Rudolph went 25 for 38 for 282 yards but no touchdowns in the 13-10 victory, although top back Justice Hill did finish the outing with 117 yards on 33 carries (but again, with no touchdowns.) The hero of the day for Oklahoma State, ultimately, was defender Ramon Richards, who picked off Sam Ehlinger in the end zone to formally hand the contest to his brethren in orange. 

#17

Michigan State (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Northwestern (Oct. 28)

It was by no means an exciting way to get the W, but the Spartans kept their longshot national championships playoffs dreams alive with a 17-9 win over Indiana. Brian Lewerke went 16 for 29 for 185 yards and one TD pass, while back LJ Scott ran for 87 yards and one trip to the end zone on 22 carries. And you have to give the defense some props, I suppose, for keeping the Hoosiers receivers and backs out of the end zone all game long. I mean, not a lot, of course, but at least some. 

#18

Virginia Tech (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Duke (Oct. 28)

Virginia Tech massacred UNC over the weekend, pummeling the Tar Heels 59-7 in a one-sided, suspense-free home-stand victory. Josh Jackson went 10 for 20 for 132 yards and three touchdown passes, with top back Coleman Fox finishing the contest with 58 yards on seven carries. And defensively, the Hokies looked stellar, holding North Carolina's pass game to just 118 and its rushing attack to an impotent 54 on the day.

#19

Memphis (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Tulane (Oct. 27)

Down by three in the fourth quarter against Houston, Memphis QB Riley Ferguson hit receiver Sean Dykes for a game-winning TD strike with just one and a half minutes to go, thus giving the Tigers the come-from-behind 42-38 victory. In all, Ferguson went 33 for 53 for 471 yards in the win, with one TD and one interception. Leading all receivers in the game was Anthony Miller, who wrapped up the affair with 178 yards on just ten receptions.

#20

Toledo (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Ball State (Oct. 26)

The MAC-best Toledo Rockets thumped the Akron Zips Saturday 48-21, in a game that saw Toledo QB Logan Woodside (easily the most porn-tastic name in college football by a country mile) collect five touchdown passes. Woodside finished the one-sided contest 17 for 24 for 304 yards and one interception, while the Rockets' run game outpaced Akron 303 yards to 42 (with Terry Swanson alone finishing the game with 123 yards on 20 carries.)

And now, you can tell your friends you saw Toledo Rockets highlights. Imagine the jealousy of your peers.

#21

Marshall (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. FIU (Oct. 28)

Middle Tennessee didn't have prayer last Friday night, as the Thundering Herd squashed 'em 38-10. Although Marshall QB Chase Litton didn't exactly post the most impressive numbers (he went 16 for 24 for 168 yards and no TD passes), you can't say the same thing about the team's rushing attack. Both Tyler King and Keion Davis wrapped up the game with two rushing TDs apiece, with the former collecting 129 yards on the day. And the rushing defense didn't look too shabby, either, holding the Blue Raiders to just 53 pointless yards on the ground.

#22

Iowa State (5-2)

Next Opponent: vs. TCU (Oct. 28)

Kyle Kempt had three touchdown passes in the Cyclones' 31-13 thumping of Texas Tech. Iowa State's QB went 22 for 32 for 192 yards, with Matthew Eaton (32 yards, five catches) collecting two end zone visits on the day. All eyes are on this Saturday, however, as Iowa State - who already scored a monumental upset against Oklahoma a few weeks back - seeks to knock TCU off the list of the unbeatens on the road.

#23

LSU (5-2)

Next Opponent: vs. Alabama (Nov. 4)

The Tigers had no problem bumping off Ole Miss Saturday, as LSU topped the Rebels 40-24. Danny Etling went 9 for 13 for 200 yards and two touchdown passes, while the Tigers rushing attack absolutely thrashed Ole Miss 393 yards to 153 (complete with Derrius Guice finishing the game with 276 yards on the day.) Equally impressive was dual threat back Darrel Williams, who finished the game with 103 yards rushing and another 105 receiving.

#24

Auburn (5-2)

Next Opponent: vs. Texas A&M (Nov. 4)

Although Jarrett Stidham had 218 yards passing in the Tigers' 52-20 win over Arkansas, oddly enough, he didn't throw either of Auburn's two TD passes on the day (although he did lob the only interception of the game, naturally.) Scoring the trick TD passes for Auburn were running back Malik Willis (62 yards on two rushes) and receiver Ryan Davis (63 yards, eight receptions), who combined for 66 total aerial yards. And then there's back Kamryn Pettway, who had three touchdown runs and 90 yards on only 11 carries for the orange and blue.

#25

Colorado State (6-2)

Next Opponent: vs. Air Force (Oct. 28)

It was a close one, but Colorado State nonetheless managed to pull out the 27-24 victory against New Mexico. Nick Stevens went 17 for 33 for 231 yards and two touchdown passes, with top rusher Izzy Matthews collecting 116 yards and one TD on 21 carries. Of course, the Rams probably shouldn't be 100 percent content with their performance, though; after all, they did allow the Lobos to rack up 318 rushing yards on the day ... 

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2017 NCAA Top 25 Rankings (Week 7!)

USA Today and the A.P. can take a hike - these are the only college football rankings anybody ought to care about.

By: JimboX
JimboXAmerican@gmail.com
@JimboX

Do you honestly respect the opinions of organizations like ESPN or USA Today to give it to you straight about college football? Of course you don't, which is where The Internet In America's 2017 NCAA Football Top 25 Rankings come into play. Every Wednesday throughout the '17 season we'll post our own selections for the best teams in college football, complete with hilariously un-P.C. (yet surprisingly thorough) recaps of their last games as well as a brief preview of their upcoming contests. Plus, we're throwing in a whole bunch of animated GIFs you can steal and post elsewhere on the 'net, because we're cool like that. Simply put, you won't get better NCAA football analysis anywhere on the Internet - and if anybody else dare claims their rankings are more authoritative, you proudly have my permission to go to their corporate offices and take a big fat stankin' shat right on their doorsteps. And with all of that out of the way, who's ready to revisit the week that was in the best kind of football there is - the one with unpaid black people without due process in rape accusations?

#01

Alabama (7-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Tennessee (Oct. 21)

In a week glutted with monumental upsets, the Tide dynasty remained unfazed, steamrolling SEC West rival Arkansas 41-9. Jalen Hurts went 12 for 19 for 155 yards and a one-to-one TD-to-INT ratio, while Damien Harris concluded the game with 125 yards and two touchdowns on nine rushes. And Bama did pretty good stopping the run, too, holding the Razorbacks to an absurdly low 27 rushing yards on the day.

#02

Georgia (7-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Florida (Oct. 28)

Their defense may not have been as dominant as it was in the last few weeks, but Georgia's offense was more than enough to run roughshod over Missouri. In the 53-28 win, Jake Fromm went 18 for 26 for 326 yards and two touchdowns (plus one interception that set up an easy Mizzou TD), but - as has been the case all season long- it was Georgia's run game that truly set (and controlled) the tempo. At the final horn, Georgia's backfield racked up 370 yards and four touchdowns, while the Dawgs' D held the Tigers' rushing attack to a piss-poor 59 on the ground.  

#03

TCU (6-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Kansas (Oct. 21)

Although the game was delayed several times due to lightning strikes, the atmospheric interference didn't really have much bearing on the outcome. In a 26-6 laugher, the Horned Frogs outgunned Kansas State 297 yards to 146 in the air and outstomped 'em 98 to 70 on the ground. Running back Sewo Olonilua wins this week's award for maximum efficiency, having collected two touchdowns on five carries that combined for a meager eight rushing yards.

#04

Penn State (6-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Michigan (Oct. 21)

Well, if the last weekend of college football felt considerably less child-molestery than usual, thine eyes did not deceive you - indeed, THE Penn State took a breather ahead of this Saturday's tilt against Michigan. Averaging 456 yards a game, the Nittany Pedophiles currently possess Division I-A ball's 33rd ranked offense; holding their opponents to just 285 yards per game, Pedo State's defense is currently ranked ninth in the nation.

#05

Wisconsin (6-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Maryland (Oct. 21)

Despite the 17-9 win over Purdue, the play of Badgers' QB Alex Hornibrook continues to disappoint. In last Saturday's victory, Hornibrook went 13 for 18 for 199 yards, one TD and two interceptions; thankfully, Wisconsin's rushing attack - which produced 295 rushing yards, 219 coming via the cleats of top rusher Jonathan Taylor - was there to bail 'em out. And the defense wasn't too bad neither, I suppose, holding the Boilermakers' O to just 155 yards passing and 66 rushing, with no touchdowns. 

Now that is a stylish way to say "LOL, fuck your secondary."

#06

Miami (5-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Syracuse (Oct. 21)

It was a nail-biter, but the Hurricanes remain unbeaten following Saturday's 25-24 come from behind victory against Georgia Tech. Malik Rosier went 23 for 37 for 297 yards and one touchdown, while top back Travis Homer collected 170 yards and one TD on 20 carries. Still, Miami's rushing defense could use some work - after all, they did let the Yellow Jackets rack up 226 yards on the ground.

#07

South Florida (6-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Tulane (Oct. 21)

The Bulls' running game was the difference maker in Saturday's 33-3 obliteration of Cincinnati. After racking up 184 yards on 16 completions, QB Quinton Flowers ran for 80 yards and one score on 15 carries, while formal backs Darius Tice and D'Ernest Johnson combined for 108 yards. And the Bulls defense looked pretty solid, too, holding the Bearcats to 178 yards passing and 95 yards rushing.

#08

Central Florida (5-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Navy (Oct. 21)

UCF utterly dominated ECU on the ground last Saturday. In a 63-21 win, the Knights recorded 238 yards and five touchdowns rushing, while their defense held the Pirates' run game to just 187 with no touchdowns. Not that QB McKenzie Milton didn't have some impressive passing stats o' his own; he wrapped up the game 21 for 27 for 324 yards and two touchdown passes.

#09

Ohio State (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Penn State (Oct. 28)

J.T. Barrett went buck wild in the Buckeyes' commanding 56-14 win over Nebraska. In the six-touchdown-plus savaging, Barrett racked up 325 yards and five touchdown passes on 27 completions - and then he decided to run the rock for another 48 yards and two more trips to the end zone. Shit, that's almost enough to get you to overlook Ohio State's shitty pass defense giving up 349 aerial yards - almost. 

#010

NC State (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Notre Dame (Oct. 28)

And all of a sudden, the Wolfpack finds themselves in the driver's seat of the ACC Atlantic division. With Clemson's upset loss to Syracuse, NC State's 35-17 win against Pittsburgh slots them into pole position of the sub-conference, with a huge game against Notre Dame on the docket two weeks from now. The question now is, will a victory over Clemson on Nov. 4 be enough to propel NC State into the ACC Championship Game come the first week of December? 

All I can say is thank God I picked Syracuse to cover the 22.5 point spread ...

#011

Clemson (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Georgia Tech (Oct. 28)

In easily the most shocking upset of the college football season thus far, the formerly undefeated Tigers got beat 27-24 by Syracuse last Friday night. Kelly Bryant could only muster 116 yards off 12 completions, with zero touchdowns, and backup Zerrick Cooper didn't really do any better, finishing the game 10 for 14 for 88 yards and no end zone receptions. Even worse, Clemson's defense totally shit the bed, allowing the Orangemen's Eric Dungey (yep, the son of Tony Dungey) to light 'em up for 278 yards and three passing touchdowns.

#012

USC (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Notre Dame (Oct. 21)

The Trojans just barely outlasted Utah over the weekend, besting Utah 28-27 in a back-and-forth slugfest. Sam Darnold went 27 for 50 for 358 yards and three touchdown passes, with top back Ronald Jones II collecting 111  yards and one end zone visit on 17 carries. But the MVP for USC had to be receiver Tyler Petite, who recorded two touchdown receptions and 79 yards on just three catches.

#013

Oklahoma (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Kansas State (Oct. 21)

In another close one, the Sooners barely prevailed 29-24 over Texas. Baker Mayfield went 17 for 27 for 302 yards and a 2-to-1 TD-to-INT ratio, while top back Trey Sermon racked up 96 yards on 20 carries and even threw a pass for 42 yards. Still, the Sooners faithful should be none too happy about allowing Sam Ehlinger to record 278 yards on the day ...

#014

Oklahoma State (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Texas (Oct. 21)

The Cowboys pretty much Roofied Baylor and had their way with their immobile, defenseless bodies on Saturday, besting the still without-a-win Golden Bears 59-16. Mason Rudolph went 19 for 31 in the affair, finishing the game with an impressive 459 yards and three aerial TD strikes, with top receiver James Washington racking up 235 yards and one score on six catches. And let's not discount Oklahoma State's rushing attack, neither - lest we forget Justice Hill's 117 yards and one rushing score on 14 touches.

#015

Washington (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. UCLA (Oct. 28)

With Saturdays's get-the-fuck-out-of-here 13-7 loss to Arizona State, there's a very strong chance that not only have the Huskies hunched the pooch as far as the National Championship playoffs are concerned, they may have just taken themselves out of the PAC-12 Championship race to boot. Well, that's what happens when your quarterback can only throw for 139 yards, while your defense let's the opposing team chalk up 245, ain't it?

Trust me - it's even better with the Benny Hill music playing on a loop.

#016

Washington State (6-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Colorado (Oct. 21)

There are "LOL WHUT" scores and then there's the score that greeted many a college football follower last Saturday morning. Not only did the formerly undefeated Cougars lose to 3-3 Cal, they got absolutely waylaid on Friday night to the tune of 37-3. Needless to say, one more loss and not only is Washington State almost certainly out of the National Playoffs discussion, they may not even be in the PAC-12 title picture at all. 

#017

Notre Dame (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. USC (Oct. 21)

The Irish took a breather last weekend but reemerge this Saturday for a biggie - a potential National Playoffs eliminator against the Trojans. Posting 471 yards a game, Notre Dame has the nation's 21st ranked offense; allowing 366 yards per game, the Irish have Division I-A ball's 48th ranked defense.

#018

Michigan State (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Indiana (Oct. 21)

It was a close one, but the Spartans still got the W against Minnesota. In a 30-27 victory, Spartans halfback L.J. Scott collected 194 yards and two touchdowns on 25 carries, while quarterback Brian Lewerke went 9 for 18 for 120 yards, no scores and an INT. Meanwhile, their defense allowed Demry Croft - who will probably be selling insurance this time next year - to lob the rock for three touchdown passes. Just something to keep in the back of your head before these guys go toe-to-toe with Penn State and Ohio State ...

#019

Michigan (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Penn State (Oct. 21)

It took overtime to do it, but the Wolverines nonetheless came out of Saturday's scrap against Indiana with a victory. John O'Korn went 10 for 20 for a measly 58 yards in the contest, but thankfully, top running back Karan Higdon was there to offset the anemic passing game with an impressive 200 yards and three touchdowns on 25 carries. Alas, we'll see if that rushing attack is enough to give the Wolverines a leg up on Penn State this Saturday ... or if John O'Korn's horrific play at QB makes at a field day for the Nittany Lions' D.

#020

San Diego State (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Fresno State (Oct. 21)

And the Aztecs fall from the ranks of the unbeaten following Saturday night's 31-14 loss to Boise State. While Christian Chapman's stats were pretty solid (12 for 27 for 240 yards and one TD pass), the SDSU rushing attack turned in an uncharacteristically underwhelming performance, collecting just 83 yards on the day while allowing the Blue Turfers to register 186 on the ground. 

"Thank you, Jesus, for these guys having worse ball control than Michael J. Fox."

#021

Virginia Tech (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. UNC (Oct. 21)

The Hokies followed up their loss to Clemson with a fairly facile 23-10 win over Boston College two weeks back, and figured last Saturday was as good as any to take a breather. VT continues their season with a home stand against North Carolina this weekend, and can make up some big ground in the standings with a victory (you know, considering Clemson lost and all last Friday night.) And just so you stat-hounds won't feel deprived, averaging 467 yards a game, the Hokies' offense is ranked 25th in the nation. Allowing 320 a contest, their defense is ranked 23rd overall.

#022

Memphis (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Houston (Oct. 19)

The Tigers forced five turnovers in their 30-27 win over Navy, in a game that revitalized their AAC Championship hopes (and their slim chances of making a major New Year's bowl game.) Memphis QB Riley Ferguson went 24 for 40 in the contest, collecting 279 yards and three touchdown passes (two of which were caught by Anthony Miller, who had 90 yards on ten catches.) And despite getting outran by Navy to the tune of 314 yards to 118, Tigers back Darrell Henderson still looked pretty good, finishing the outing with 94 yards on 12 carries. 

#023

Toledo (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Akron (Oct. 21)

The Rockets didn't have much use for quarterback Logan Woodside in their 30-10 win over Central Michigan. Logan finished the game with a scant 89 yards on ten receptions, with a grand total of zero touchdowns. So how did Toledo pull out the W? Well, you can attribute that to their run game, which saw the Rockets backfield (led by Terry Swanson, who finished the game with 145 yards and two TD runs) outpace the Chippewas 310 yards to just 62.

#024

Virginia (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Boston College (Oct. 21)

The Cavaliers are one of those teams nobody's talking about, despite having a record better than a good 80 percent of the ACC (including Florida State and Louisville, both of whom have pretty much said "fuck it" and called it a season.) In the Cavs latest outing, they beat UNC 20-14 in a game that saw QB Kurt Benkert go 19 for 31 for 249 yards and two touchdowns. And even though they did let the Tar Heels outrun 'em 211 to 156, they still managed to get a lot of ground production out of Jordan Ellis, who wrapped up the shindig with 135 yards on 27 carries.

#025

Marshall (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Middle Tennessee (Oct. 20)

Yep, Marshall is back in the thick of things again (doesn't it seem like they do this every year around this point in the season?) Over the weekend they drubbed Old Dominion 35-3, in a contest that saw Chase Litton lob the rock for 176 yards and three touchdown passes, two of which landed in the arms of receiver Tyre Brady, whose final output for the day was 76 yards on five receptions. With a relatively easy schedule, don't be surprised if the Thundering Herd run the table throughout the remainder of the season - and considering how wacky things have gotten in college ball as of late, don't count these guys out of a big bowl appearance just yet ... 

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2017 NCAA Football Top 25 Rankings (Week 6!)

USA Today and the A.P. can take a hike - these are the only college football rankings anybody ought to care about.

By: Jimbo X
JimboXAmerican@gmail.com
@JimboX

#01

Alabama (6-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Arkansas (Oct. 14)

Stop me if you've heard this one before - Alabama just rolled another SEC West opponent. In Saturday's 24-19 win - trust me, the game was nowhere near as close as the final score would suggest - Alabama managed to outrun Texas A&M by a 232-to-71-yard margin, with Damien Harris alone chewing up the field (not literally, that's probably a penalty) for 124 yards and one end zone saunter on 14 carries. Alas, Jalen Hurts did underperform (13 for 22, 123 yards and just one passing TD), while the Tide's vaunted D allowed Kellen Mond to rack up 237 yards in the air. Uh-oh ... does this mean Bama's Achilles' Heel is its pass protection? We'll just have to wait and see, I 'spose ...

#02

Clemson (6-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Syracuse (Oct. 13)

Kelly Bryant went 21 for 29 for 200 yards and a one TD/one INT split in the Tigers' 28-14 win over Wake Forest. And then he exited the contest with an ankle injury, and it's uncertain whether he will be back for this Friday night's game against Syracuse. So, just how far can Clemson go with back up QBs Hunter Johnson and Zerrick Cooper under center? We should get a pretty good idea by the time Saturday morning rolls around.

#03

Washington (6-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Arizona State (Oct. 14)

As evident by the Huskies' 39-7 win over Cal, an argument can be made that Washington might have the best QB-RB-WR triple threat in the country. In last Saturday night's outing, Jake Browning went 27 for 40 for 215 yards and two touchdowns (plus another 20 yards rushing, with an extra TD), while back Myles Gaskin finished the contest with 91 yards and two end zone gallops on 24 carries. And then there's wideout Hunter Bryant, who wrapped up the affair with 121 yards and one TD haul on nine receptions. Needless to say - this is a really potent offense we're working with here.

#04

Georgia (6-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Missouri (Oct. 14)

Jake Fromm had two touchdown passes and 102 yards on seven completions, but that's not the x-factor in the Bulldogs' 45-14 victory over Vanderbilt. No, that would be Georgia's run game, which outyarded the Commodores by a preposterous 423-to-64 yard margin. Backs Sony Michel and Nick Chubb both finished the contest with more than 130 rushing yards a piece, combining for three rushing touchdowns. Fuck, they even let Evander Holyfield's kid run it in for a score, because why the hell not when your ground game is THAT good? 

#05

Penn State (6-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Michigan (Oct. 21)

The Nittany Pedo-Bears drubbed Northwestern over the weekend, besting the Wildcats 31-7 in a game that saw Trace McSorely lob the rock for 245 yards and one TD on 25 completions. Saquon Barkley collected two touchdowns on the day, although he only averaged 75 yards on 16 carries. Hmmm ... his production numbers have been suspiciously low these last two weeks. Just something I'm throwing out there - not that I would be implying he secretly has an injury or anything like that.

Yes, it is that easy to score points in the PAC-12.

#06

Washington State (6-0)

Next Opponent: vs. California (Oct. 13)

Luke Falk went balls out in the Cougars' commanding 33-10 win over Oregon. Washington's QB went 24 for 42 in the contest, wrapping up the game with 282 yards and three touchdown passes - which is probably good enough to overlook the fact he finished the game with minus 23 yards rushing. Still, Washington State looked sloppy at times, turning the ball over twice and letting Oregon defenders sack Falk four times; thankfully, the Cougars defense was more than happy to return the favor and sack Oregon's QB just as many times, in addition to picking him off twice. 

#07

TCU (5-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Kansas State (Oct. 14)

It was a close one, but the Horned Frogs nonetheless managed to stave off West Virginia in Saturday's 31-24 victory. Kenny Hill went 15 for 28 for 188 yards and one touchdown pass, with top back Kyle Hicks running the rock for 71 yards on 11 carries. Alas, TCU cannot be feeling too complacent about its atrocious pass defense; after all, they did let Will Grier rack up 366 yards in the air, along with three easy touchdown passes.

#08

Wisconsin (5-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Purdue (Oct. 14)

Wisconsin outyarded Nebraska 353-to-110 on the ground in Saturday's 38-17 win, with Jonathan Taylor collecting 249 yards and two touchdowns all by his damned self. When you're having that much success running the ball, you can almost overlook Alex Hornibrook collecting just 113 aerial yards on the day - and the fact Nebraska outgunned 'em in the air by more than 150 passing yards.

#09

Miami (4-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Georgia Tech (Oct. 14)

It was a close one, but the Hurricanes still managed to surmount Florida State over the weekend. In a narrow 24-20 victory, Malik Rosier went 19 for 44 for 254 yards, three touchdown passes and one INT, with underrated receiver Braxton Berrios concluding the game with 90 yards and two touchdown hauls on eight receptions. Still, that Miami allowed FSU to outrun them 203 yards to 83 yards doesn't bode well for the Canes - especially when they've got the nation's second best rushing offense next up on their schedule.

#10

San Diego State (6-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Boise State (Oct. 14)

Rashaad Penny had 170 yards and two touchdowns in the Aztecs' 41-10 drubbing of UNLV, as San Diego State ultimately outyarded the Rebels 302 yards to 106 yards. Meanwhile, Christian Chapman finished the game 14 for 24 for 172 yards and no touchdown passes, though he did manage to record one scrambling score. Things get interesting this Saturday, as the new non-Power Five darling goes cleat-to-cleat with the old non-Power Five darling in a pivotal Mountain West clash that could have big implications come New Years' bowl selection time.

In case you've ever wondered what the kind of people who pay to see the UNLV Rebels play look like - wonder no more.

#11

South Florida (5-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Cincinnati (Oct. 14)

South Florida took the week off and are set to re-emerge this weekend to go toe-to-toe with Cincinnati. At the almost midway point of the NCAA football season, South Florida is the tenth-best offense in the country, averaging 510 yards a game. Allowing just 294 yards per game, the Bulls also possess Division I-A ball's 15th ranked defense.

#12

Navy (5-0)

Next Opponent: vs. Memphis (Oct. 14)

In one of the best games of the season nobody watched, Navy managed to just barely get by Air Force 48-45 in a shootout - well, I guess foot race would be the more apt metaphor - that saw the teams combine for 811 yards on the ground. Big ups to Midshipmen QB Zach Abbey, who not only recorded two touchdown passes on four completions, but finished the game with 214 rushing yards (with two end zone visits) on 29 carries. 

#13

Central Florida (4-0)

Next Opponent: vs. East Carolina (Oct. 14)

In the Knights' 51-23 win over Cincinnati, Central Florida QB McKenzie Milton racked up FIVE touchdown passes, concluding the game with 374 yards on just 16 passes. Top receiver Tre'Quan Smith finished the outing with 165 yards and three touchdowns on only five receptions, while top back Marlon Williams wrapped up the contest with 47 yards on a single carry. So, uh, if they merged South Florida and Central Florida into a single team, do you think they could take the ACC Coastal crown?

#14

Ohio State (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Nebraska (Oct. 14)

Holy goddamn shit, did the Buckeyes rectally annihilate Maryland. In Ohio State's 62-14 victory, the Buckeyes managed to outyard the Terrapins on the ground 281-to-50 and outyard 'em in the air by an even more preposterous 303-to-16 margin. With three touchdowns and 261 aerial yards off 20 completions, J.T. Barrett's final yardage count was literally ten times the total passing offensive output of Maryland - whose quarterbacks each finished the game with QBRs of 0.1.

#15

NC State (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Pittsburgh (Oct. 14)

And just like that, the Wolfpack dashed Louisville's playoffs dreams. In a shocking Friday night upset, NC State defeated the Cardinals 39-25, with Ryan Finley (20 for 31, 367 yards, one TD) just barely edging out Lamar Jackson (26 for 47, 354 yards, one TD, one INT) in a shootout. Two Wolfpack receivers (Kelvin Harmon and Jaylen Samuels) each finished the game with more than 100 yards receiving, while NC State back Nyheim Hines led all rushers with 102 yards and two end zone visitations on 18 carries. Of course, this begs the question: is NC State finished destroying the National Championship aspirations of big-time ACC programs just yet?

And that's how you make a Heisman trophy campaign vanish into thin air.

#16

Notre Dame (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. USC (Oct. 21)

Never mind Ian Book's 146-yard, one TD/two INT passing day - Notre Dame's run game was more than enough to give 'em the edge against North Carolina. In the Irish's 33-10 win over the Tar Heels, ND's backfield managed to outrun UNC by a 341-yard to 86-yard margin, with top backs Deion McIntosh and Josh Adams each finishing the outing with more than 118 yards on the ground. Alas, one has to wonder if Notre Dame's anemic aerial game will be enough to keep them competitive against the Trojans two Saturdays from now ... 

#17

USC (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Utah (Oct. 14)

Following a demoralizing loss to Washington State, the Trojans rebounded with a 38-10 manhandling of the Beavers. Sam Darnold has three touchdowns and one interception in the big win over Oregon State, concluding the affair with 316 yards on 23 completions, and Ronald Jones II continues to impress, ending the day with 79 yards and one TD on 12 carries. And the defense didn't look all that bad, neither, holding the Beavers to just 197 yards passing and only 122 rushing.

#18

Auburn (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. LSU (Oct. 14)

In Auburn's 44-23 win against Ole Miss, Jarrett Stidham went 14 for 21 for 23 yards and two touchdown passes, with top receiver Ryan Davis finishing the game with 75 yards and one score on only two receptions. Alas, while back Kerryon Johnson's three-touchdown, 204-yard rushing day is super-duper-impressive, we've got to talk about this team's pass coverage - sorry, but allowing Shae Patterson to lob the rock for 346 yards most definitely ain't a recipe for winning the Iron Bowl anytime soon.

#19

Oklahoma (4-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Texas (Oct. 14)

I think it's safe to say Iowa State's 38-31 win against Oklahoma is EASILY the biggest upset of the season thus far. Despite Baker Mayfield finishing the game with 306 yards and two touchdown passes, he got TOTALLY eclipsed by Cyclones QB Kyle Kempt, who concluded the contest 18 for 24 for 343 yards and three passing touchdowns. The question now is, will the Sooners recover this weekend against Texas, or will the annual rivalry game officially put the kibosh on their National Championship aspirations?

#20

Oklahoma State (4-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Baylor (Oct. 14)

The Cowboys had a bye over the weekend and will resume their season this Saturday against Baylor. At the week six point of the season, Oklahoma State is averaging 399.2 passing yards per game - enough yardage to make them the second best aerial offense in Division I-A football. Alas, allowing 370 yards of total offense per game, the Cowboys are ranked 54th in terms of total defense.

What is it about football players and their proclivities for puncturing giant O's with flagpoles?

#21

Texas Tech (4-1)

Next Opponent: vs. West Virginia (Oct. 14)

In a 65-19 route of Kansas, Texas Tech back Desmond Nisby racked up 93 yards and four touchdown runs on just 11 carries - and he still wasn't the most productive man in the backfield for the Red Raiders (that was Justin Stockton, by the way, who finished the game with 161 yards on 15 carries.) Quarterback Nic Shimonek looked pretty swell, too: at the final horn, he went 19 for 24 for 233 yards, two touchdown passes and one interception.

#22

Michigan State (4-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Minnesota (Oct. 14)

And just like that, the Spartans' Big 10 championship run gets a huge shot in the arm. In a rain-soaked slog of a game, Michigan State managed to outpace the Wolverines on the ground, outyarding their in-state arch rivals 158-to-102 in the 14-10 victory. And while the Spartans did let John O'Korn collect 198 yards in the air, Michigan State QB Brian Lewerke (11 for 22, 94 yards) did do something he couldn't - that is, actually throw a touchdown pass in the game.

#23

Michigan (4-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Indiana (Oct. 14)

Yep, it's pretty much all over for Michigan now. After dropping a 14-10 heartbreaker at home to their in-state rivals, it's probably safe to assume this team ain't going to fare any better against Penn State or Ohio State a little bit later down the road. Granted, the game this weekend against Indiana should be a mild reprieve, but then again, if O'Korn keeps lobbing three interceptions a game, fuck, anything can happen.

#24

Troy (4-1)

Next Opponent: vs. South Alabama (Oct. 11)

After upsetting LSU two weeks back, Troy took a breather over the weekend, with a throwdown against South Alabama schedule for later tonight. Posting 432 yards per game, the Trojans have Division I-A ball's 50th-ranked offense; allowing 340 a game, they're the nation's 31st-ranked defense. And no - I bet you still have no clue what state the university is located in.

#25

Kentucky (5-1)

Next Opponent: vs. Mississippi State (Oct. 21)

With Saturday's 40-34 win over Missouri, the Wildcats are the second-ranked team in the SEC East, behind Georgia. And don't look now, but their sole loss of the year was by a one-point margin against Florida. With a murderer's row of opponents on their schedule - they end the year with back-to-back games against UGA and Louisville - its unlikely that the team will be playing for the SEC Championship, but that doesn't mean they can't score an upset win or two and royally screw up the SEC title - and by proxy, National Championship - picture.

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